Notes from a Friend's Town

On motivators...

2012-02-07T14:28:00.001-06:00

If properly inspired, words run together with wires would celebrate cement housewarmings. Christenings of curtains and covers and countertops assembled to welcome the pinnacle of posturing, Khalil & Basquiat renderings to drive your mind's chronograph.
If properly inspired, words run together with my breath would incite wildfires, scorching the underbrush and old tires, clearing the way for autumn harvests .
If properly inspired, words linked together in my mind would cease the need to purge.

Musings on my potential if properly inspired ...

Can a bliss be soo simple?

2012-01-27T14:24:00.000-06:00

1. Surprised I've lasted as long as I have without being checked on neglecting the basics. Special thanks to all the women who noticed I didn't sufficiently relay compliments and opted to say nothing.

2. I'd tell you "I miss you" but I don't want to risk being ignored or worse yet, hearing some trite saying about moving on. My pride won't tolerate that.

3. By design, not desire, I'm suspending one of my vices. I'm sure this will include some period of adjustment that will last x weeks. Hopefully, not a soul will be able to tell the difference until long after I've established a new routine.

4. There was a week, some time ago,fell in love and forgot to do my laundry. The week that followed it was unnecessarily awkward for obvious reasons.

5. The older you are, the more effort it appears is involved in rebelling. This is how 20yr liberals become 30something conservatives with political amnesia.

6. For 20 yrs he wanted cable TV & she said no, not having it. She's been gone a month, he had Direct TV installed a week ago. He barely watches it.

7. There's a huge formality in the form of graduation exercises at the end of this semester. I'm not interested in attending at all. I also have a decent number of family & friends who will literally have throw a temper tantrum if I don't go. I haven't decided how I'm going to handle this yet. As much as I love them all, I've no desire to sit through 4hrs of boring, lifeless Black Catholic rituals in the interest of keeping people happy.

8. All this Ace of Spade I drink just to piss out / I mean I like the taste/ (but) could've saved myself 6 hrs - S. Carter << classic example of the means not justifying the ends.

9. According to Kant, it is immoral not to develop your innate talents. In light of this discovery, while I despise systems of morality, I intend to further refine whatever talents I'm currently letting lie dormant.

10. First, A Brave New Wor now 1984. This post modern British Literature course couldn't do more dismiss my attention.

Earl Grey, Cool Water, and ......

2012-01-05T19:44:00.000-06:00

1. I've never started a year in this manner before, quite frankly, I never want one to begin like this again. Yet, I know better, rather I'm aware that my wants mean nothing.

2. I lead a life aided by technology, however certain conversations are always better had in person. I'll take a death sentence in person versus over the phone any day.

3. Courtesy of recent bump in the road, I've elected to embark upon a path that doesn't allow for any casual dating. It's not that it's a horrible practice, it's that I manage to acquire some of the most involved losses. It's beyond clear to me that my energies are better focused elsewhere.

4. Don't ask me who's going to win the Presidential Election of 2012. It's not apathy, I simply can't be bothered with such shenanigans when there's bills to be paid.

5. Convention advises that I consume copious amounts of alcohol as a means of managing the less than enjoyable emotions that this recent bump in the road has brought to the surface. I scoff at convention, as it does nothing to alter my reality and in failing to do so, fails to offer any solace.

6. You can't toss the cake out and then ask for the icing, doesn't work that way.

7. I'll update this again properly when the mood strikes me.

It's been a long morning ...

2011-12-10T08:40:00.001-06:00

this morning my mother passed. I'm 2 cups of coffee in on some of life's most valuable wisdom.

Your devotion in my absence is appreciated.

On Holiday Presentations

2011-11-24T15:04:00.001-06:00

1.
Today we feast on starches
& proteins
& rich sugars swimming in
leaded creams as we carry
on a tradition of thankfullness.

Yet, were we thankful in the drought?

2. I've made it a priority of my sense of style to always include a bit of color, especially in the fall. As a balance of sorts to the weather's affect on one's spirit. I've been doing a horrid job of it all this week. There's hope for today, outings remain.

3. I skipped football again this year. It wasn't even a conscious decision either. Just didn't sit on the sofa to watch it.

4. My summer investment in a denim jacket has proved quite wise. It's a must have piece.

5. Julia Alvarez's In the Time of Butterflies is a wonderful book. Her presentation of life under Trujillo is breathtaking. Yea, I said breathtaking.

6. These candied yams are about to be amazing!

7. I lead a rich life, wealthy in quality beyond measure. The mere fact that I can recall multiple memories of this holiday in recent years is alone testimony enough.

8. I miss my Mom.

Flannel & Denim & Bees waxed leathers

2011-11-16T22:15:00.000-06:00

1. I'll readily admit that my knowledge of the war to restore Palestine has mainly been of a passing nature. While ongoing and horrific, the distance afforded to me by living in America easily envelops one in the luxury of ignorance. I've had no problem accepting such a generous offer. I didn't want the burden of another war on my conscious anyways.

Fast forward several years, my knowledge is expanding but it's a full time job to stay abreast of the conflict. I'm enrolled in a Post Colonial Literature course this semester and one of the text, Mornings in Jenin deals with the conflict. We've viewed the film Salt of this Sea to provide a visual catalog of this most coveted land. I've grown angry with my complacency, my devotion to ignoring the details of this experience in hopes of preserving my comfort zone.

2. There's more speculation about the production of atomic weapons in Iran. The question remains however, what end result will realistically be achieved if the American Government engages in any action with Iran? How many more young & old people are to be sacrificed in an ideological war significantly fueled by contradicting religious text? In so much as Iran's nuclear endeavors are ecologically sound, there are more pressing matters that our government should address on the domestic front (how does the richest nation in the world, home to countless engineered food products, have millions of starving citizens attempting to sleep every night?).

As for the concerns about "stability in the region" & "terror threats" both notions are remarkably outdated and problematic. War & Love are two constants of the human condition. Terror is food for the ignorant to feast upon. I've more to say on this matter, it's a tad repressed. I'll revisit this again soon.

3. All kinds of bizarre things happen & thrive on the Northshore (Slidell/Covington/Madeville area). I don't notice public outcry about these cases to be as aggressive as when discussions regarding what happens within the New Orleans area (Orleans Parish specifically). I don't do race baiting/race wars, a spade is a spade though.

4. I need this cold snap to snap so I can have my seasonal cold then recover strong and enjoy the cold of the morning as I attempt to meditate. These 3 day cold spells just encourage late sleeping and general laziness.

5. When I wanted a distraction, none was to be found. No where, I searched. The tides shift and I no longer have need for a distraction and I'm literally tripping over them.

6. I have a good friend who I've known since childhood, since we were 6 yrs old to be exact. We got into trouble all the time during our late teens/early twenties, primarily with our parents. So much so, that we weren't allowed to hang out with each other because only in each other's presence would the most outlandish shit happen. I'm suppose to be linking up with him soon, I hope for a very ordinary, excitement free evening. I don't recall envisioning the day when such an evening would sound as appealing as it does.

7. I want what I have therefore I have what I want. If it exists outside of my possession, it also exists beyond my desires. Daily, I remind myself of this in order to retain my perspective and not be consumed in the consumption based reality which modernity has provided the masses.

8. Jerry Sandusky is a tortured, sick human being whose actions warrant a public execution. The same applies to Paterno & everyone else who knew what was going on and refused to report it to the police.

I've no faith in the American Justice System and would be less than surprised if a hung jury was the result of his trial. Some would argue that America is far to advanced for such "rudimentary" dispensations of justice. I'll argue that we are actually too advanced to deal with this matter in the manner in which it should be handled. May the deity of his devotion have compassion on what remains of his soul because he will find none from me.

This is my stance regarding anyone who is abusing children, man or woman, race, age, class, demographic marker of your preference aside.

I don't pray often (for reasons you're more than welcome to hear should be fortunate enough to ask me in person) but I have prayed that these young men will able to face the demon of their abuse and come to a place of understanding that allows them to fulfill their exceed their potential in spite of their experience.

9. I understand you want to Occupy Wall Street, Main Street, All Streets etc but who's sustaining your reality while you engage in civil disobedience? The mere fact that you can even organize and find this means of expression viable speaks to the reality that even America's poor are the richest in the world. This naive notion that wealth will *ever* be equally distributed would be laughable if people weren't so entranced by it. Hitler was once quoted for declaring that "Equality is the dream of small children on holiday". While he was obviously a troubled soul, there is truth in that declaration. A group of people, living as a collective, equally distributing resources among themselves in a post colonial, post industrial reality is laughable at best. I applaud your efforts though, you dutiful protesters, you afford the rest of us, who are inclined to watch the evening news, something to digest aside from homicides and failed foreign policy.

10. There was a time when I considered becoming a welder. I'm sure that would have significantly altered the pass decade I've lived through, an experienced welder potentially a not soo experienced writer.

Rocks not neat unless it's below 48°

2011-11-06T15:24:00.001-06:00

1. Finally made it out to San Francisco last weekend. Gorgeous area, rode alongside the Pacific & sat in awe of the endless horizon. Experienced a little of each major neighborhood by foot, breaking in my red Clark's Desert Boots quite nicely. It's unfortunate that in such a beautiful land, I saw soo many without shelter. Quite often within a 10 minute stroll of million dollar homes. Such is life in America.

2. It's a rule of the universe that dealing with family requires all of the etiquette one can recall. That I find both inconvenient & unfortunate.

3. Found socks & plenty of vinyls in San Francisco. Brought back the socks, made notes on the later.

4. Turquoise blazer >>>>>

5. Just because its convenient does mean I'm convinced.

6. Applause to Herman Cain, aka Clarence Thomas's corporate cousin. The media deals that will follow his speculation on a presidential run could easily add up to $5 Mil. That's a payday.

7. Columbus Day one month, Thanksgiving the next, we really hate Native Americans at the end of the year don't we?!

8. 40 Days, 40 nights until ..

of the sand...

2011-10-26T13:44:00.001-06:00

Before me lies the cold of fall, my birth preceding the season of warm spices &
sharp winds making night of days littered with clouds.
Historically, my vision is more optimistic during this period,
rose tinted lenses courtesy of "you were blessed with another year" celebrations.

I've come to appreciate that, reminded each year that clarity will be born of harsh North winds.
This year offers nothing different, nothing to suspend my anticipation.
There is however, an added bonus so to say.

This year l look forward to dancing slowly in the rain.
Two-stepping in a Tuesday thunderstorm, beauty clouding our absurdity.

Black Paperclips and Desert Roses

2011-10-12T22:58:00.001-06:00

1. One way or another, I find my lunch sponsored by the good people of Central & South America. I salute them, because they keep my hunger in check and my wallet happy. Of course the cuisine is second to none during the allotted hour of peace that punctuates the work day.

2. I haven't worn a watch in years, between my cell phone and an iPod, the time has always been readily available. For reasons I have yet to locate, I decided it was time to begin wearing one again in January of this year. I've been haphazardly going about selecting a piece since then without making a decision. The decision making process has recently ended. It's quite the timepiece, if I may say so myself. Next time I see you, I'll tell you all about it.

3. Make sure that when you destroy an alliance, that which you are dismissing is accounted for in the party you're siding with. As a matter of fact, make sure that which you're dismissing and more is present in the party you side with - Yv. St. LeFleur

4. The truth you make public about a person is actually the perception you have of them. Make sure the image you present the public is an accurate assessment of the totality of the party being discussed (usually in said party's absence).

5. I really could use a few extra hours in the day, and by a few I mean 12.

6. In any relationship you have, whether it be business or personal, make sure that your actions reflect a genuine respect for all that is invested in the relationship. When you act in any other manner, you insult the investors.

7. If I could suspend two reading list to work on my third reading list, I'd be a happy(er) scholar. So instead, I keep my coffee black and water by the gallon at my side.

8. I've a trip coming up soon to one of the coolest cities in the country and while I have 3 separate lists of sights to see, it would be remarkably helpful if I narrowed those down to one list. It would also be wise if I checked the weather least I find myself in the cold with a thin sweater. No bueno senor, no bueno.

9. Who needs new socks?! This writer does! Ok, maybe not need but definitely want and will soon acquire.

10. I'm taking a Post Colonial Literature course currently and aside from drowning in PoCo theory (nerd life), I'm furthering my understanding of the post-colonial reality through the text we're examining. We've already completed Half of a Yellow Sun, God Dies By the Nile, & the biopic film Lumumba. I'm continually amazed by the stories (horrors) that arent' discussed in the American context.

11. The fall of empire will appear to it's loyal subjects as the result of a series of ill informed actions. The circle of advisers will note that the empire fell because of continued disregard for principles that maintained the structure. My forecasts, while most unfortunate, remains remarkably accurate. As an adviser, I am disappointed in this revelation but decisions are often made with no regard my words. I merely relay a spectators perspective.

12. You lobbied for a place at the table, wore down the chair of the committee, and even received an invite to several key events. Then you no-showed & grew silent, like you were suddenly at a loss for words. <<< that is all kinds of waq & so are you.

Colored Bubbles & Giant Bananas

2011-10-04T21:54:00.001-06:00

1. It takes a fresh perspective to remind you of that which you are already aware.

2. If I come to you with a serious matter and you can't scrape up two ounces of maturity to at least acknowledge whats been presented, its best we cease our exchange.

3. In light of some less than enjoyable news, I've both lost my focus and acquired a degree of clarity about my life. Neither of which offsets the other sufficiently to forecast forward motion but it makes the time seated pass with a greater degree of purpose.

4. When others are brave enough to make you aware of what they see in you, even if you don't completely understand their reasoning, listen to the conviction that crosses their lips.

5. Be at ease with your vices, as such allows you to speak with conviction when you warn others of the downside of those guilty pleasures.

6. Leave no truth unspoken. Theres a remarkable peace that comes when you know you've been completely honest with some one, even if your honest births the end of the exchange.

7. As soon as I catch up on my rest (running joke), I'll begin expanding my knowledge of Africa & the Middle East.

8. It's never to brag, but another man's bad decisions have in part allowed me to experience something quite wonderful. For that, I thank him. If I told him as much, we'd probably have to box but I really do appreciate him screwing up royally.

9. A proper massage is next on my list. Hopefully I can find someone to drive me home afterwards cause I won't be good for much.

10. Canine flatulence is one of the downsides to having an indoor companion. Every time, it's just as bad as you remember it.

11. As a man, you always keep score, even when the experience is qualitative. It's something in the conditioning you endure that allows such.

12. The question is not are you tired, it's how much can you get accomplished while tired.

13. At some point soon, a pitcher of lager & a pool table are going to make a very enjoyable evening for me.

Is this thing on?

2011-09-24T23:50:00.000-06:00

Peace Peace,

My apologies for the absence, life has been living me out of sleep and solitude. I'll have some dry explanation soon. This morning, I have only this. May it be sufficient.

W

Muscle(d) Memories

2011-08-21T19:16:00.004-06:00

photo credit: K.J.Jones

1. I've published a book of my writings, mainly poetry, available for purchase here. Buy a copy or 2 so we can fight my hunger together, as a unified force. Aided by your funding, my direction is clarified.

2. Its quite amazing what perspective allows you to handle and assess. In it's absence, I found a certain exchange magnanimous, filled with opaque understandings that were overarching principles preventing me from dealing comfortably with the entire matter. Once I was afforded perspective and thus able to postulate at some motivators, I no longer found myself unable to operate in the exchange. It's clearer now, and for that, I am grateful.

3. The women of my generation make less sense the more I interact with them. I'm sure millions of men before me have said the same thing and if they haven't chances are they weren't interested in women in the first place. No shots fired of course, but I don't believe gay men are overly concerned with the confusion that is inherent in dating some of these women. Either way, I've resigned myself to shift my focus, as this "puzzle" is neither going anywhere nor is it in any hurry to be solved. I could probably clear at least one of my list if I didn't bother with dating and the trivial reality that it creates.

3a. Unless we're close friends, friends that have seen each other cry, don't invite me to your wedding. I'm happy for you, really I am but I don't care to devote any portion of my day to celebrating your relationship. No, free liquor doesn't entice me, nor does the potential presence of your one beautiful friend that I'm interested in. If she's not available at another function prior to your wedding, I'll wave away the pick. I'm single and bitter, I'm just more concerned with time management than you are at this juncture.

4. It's been an interesting full of a lot & a little. You'll find more insights here. Class starts tomorrow and I need to finish laundry and such. I'll keep you posted as long as you check-in. Don't forget to grab a copy of my book, link under #1.

On Raekwon x Ghostface

2011-08-21T19:15:00.001-06:00

Rock the Bells made a tour stop in New Orleans recently. Ghostface & Raekwon performing Only Built for Cuban Links & Mobb Depp performing Infamous all at the House of Blues, one night only.

I grew up in the mid 90s so I recall WuTang Clan & their offerings during that era. It was a grimey and dark time. Their descriptions of New York City life during that time reflected said reality. Crack cocaine had spread across the country and those involved were often shrewd businessmen whose patience often was thicker the dirty currency crammed deep into their dungarees. Their music would often transport you to a brutally honest space in time where your life could end for less than the change in your pocket. They were an untouchable group of Super Niggas, determined to make it known that money doesn't alter behavior patterns. They we(a)re WuTang. Sadly enough, they appear to be the same as 40 year old men.

The show was an excellent show for the Hip Hop purest, one of the esteemed classics of the genre was being performed by the original artists in it's entirety. It was in this moment that I realized I had matured beyond this phase of being impressed by this bravado. I'm rambling here but just finish the post. These men are millionaires, literally being paid to recite words spoken for the first time 15 years ago and there is a packed venue filled with people who esteem the offering.

I appreciate an honest story but I don't live in that reality. I'm not a drug dealer, and I don't need to drown out my conscious with the tales of men who have done and do things I am no where near interested in doing nor have I ever done. I need fantasies that are devoid of stress and suffering, not ones that would fail to exist in their absence. It was with this understanding that I left the show midday through the OBFCL set. I had no use for what was being performed and found no amusement in the performance.

As I walked away from the House of Blues, home of all corporately sponsored magic moments in music, I became even clearer to me that I need to readdress my relationship to some of the music I have grown fond of over the years. This will undoubtedly result in some album deletions, some albums will also be removed from the list of new music to acquire. I've outgrown a large portion of the lyrics I know Inside & out, My iPod should reflect as much. My speech certainly should.

Discounts, damages, donations

2011-07-21T10:37:00.003-06:00

1. If I owe you, bill me.

3. I've this habit of "reading" people when we meet first. It's as presumptuous as it sounds, on both readings. I've had my assumptions independently verified on several occasions. There remains the strong possibility that I'm guessing very well, very often.

2. For the first time in my adult life, not being able to experience an object of my desires is bothering me. Such that my natural rhythms are off and in routine there exists no solace.

4. Communication technology and it's ability to make the notion of being unavailable obsolete is beginning to take it's toll on my resolve. I have 4 email addresses, Facebook, Twitter, Tumblr, and a blog yet none of them resonate with my ethos on communication. None of them afford me the awkward silences that occur when the conversation between people exchanging spent air and long stares reaches an unexpected lull. The moment when you have to jog your memory, not your browser to keep the exchange going. I need little in this life, but in that little, those awkward silences rank very highly. top five to be exact.

5. The more I work in retail, the less patience I have for rude behavior. It cost nothing for you to reply, "Good Morning/Afternoon" when greeted. Perhaps my expectations are too high.

6. I've been inspired by forces that shall remain nameless to work out and tone up. I've no desire for a "gym body" just one that's has less padding and more versatile muscle groups. It could even result me being shirtless come next summer. More than likely, it'll allow me to spar with Chewy without tiring out in 45 minutes.

7. Is the Southerner's dream really just a nice garden and a well oiled gun? For some, I'll say yes. I won't exclude myself from that group but I will say I'm not interested in either until I get closer to enjoying grandchildren which is no time soon.

8. Gifts are to be matched, favors must be returned & credit must be repayed. These are not my rules, these are understandings that have been developed over centuries of commercial transactions.

I need a new comb

2011-07-18T13:26:00.003-06:00

1. If the person you're planning to marry comes up in conversation and your speech about them reflects an understanding of them as a role player and not as an active partner in the future that's being discussed, there is a problem. You've reduced the marriage to an objective to be completed, which strips it of it's significance.

2. It's written on my face and you can read it from my psalms.

3. There is something to be learned from a (wo)man who lives a life devoid of significant connection to material goods. It provides an immense degree of freedom & will alter the relationship you have with your living space. It's a bit much for me at this juncture but I do respect those are able to procure the most from such a lifestyle.

4. In listening to what isn't being said, I've been able to better understand what is being said and this deciphering act keeps me from saying much at all which reads to the masses as though I have little to say, if anything, at all. I'm just trying to find my place in the conversation.

5. Its amazing how easily "deep thinkers" are turned around when faced with a series of less than clear references.

6. Who will survive in America?

7. The never ending need to remain abreast of everything thats going on allover the world at all times and maintain a strong conversational knowledge of the intricacies of each event and the effect it has on it's sphere of immediate influence, mainly constrained to 3 degrees of removal or less is a full time job. It also robs me of any semblance of rest, as my mind fails to shut down and my dreaming hours are void of dreams.

8. I like Google+ as a Facebook alternative. The masses however are very much devoted to the friendly GUI that Facebook offers and some aspects of Google+ remind even my brighter friends that they need to refresh and expand their working knowledge of logic and if-then clauses. Some of the experience reminds me of Windows network administrating. I wasn't an administrator but I was training to become one, I changed my mind when I realized that the men who were teaching the course were brilliant but socially awkward because their careers demanded that they be in a room full of servers all day with very little physical human interaction. I need human interaction, even when I say I don't.

9. Japan wins the World Cup yesterday and Americans offer this condescending commentary "It's been a rough year for them, so it's ok" Really?! A damn World Cup win is going to offset the damage caused by the tsunamis? You mean to tell me a trophy is going to make the radioactive meat on the shelves safe to consume? It'll help rebuild villages and cities wiped off the map too??

10. Why do men's magazines like Details, Esquire, GQ, etc always suggest the most expensive clothing items for men each season? It never fails, no matter what the item is, they can't endorse the more accessible version. The $600 Summer weight sweater always gets the nod.

Florals & Stripes

2011-07-07T14:51:00.001-06:00

* balloonboyd.tumblr.com is my Tumblr page. Give a gander and hit follow, it'll make my day.

1. I've the urge to place a hole in a proverbial ant hill just to see the ants scramble to repair the destruction. It would be my fortune to kick an empty mound wide open.

2. I grilled ribs for July 4th, prepped them the night before with a rub and everything. When I decided it was time to eat, I had no desire to eat any of it. I hope I'm not losing my affinity for animal protein, its one of the only primitive connections to manhood that remain once you dismiss all things patriarchal (I'm still working on that) .

3. There remains nothing more annoying that unfinished business, especially when it is of a personal matter and readily resolvable. No sense in attempting to bring proper closure to the matter, an ending is an ending regardless of its lack of finesse.

4. I was brought to a place of accepting the obvious this morning. I took on too many projects with my ego convincing me that I would be able to do it all, each venture becoming all it could be as I moved around in a furry induced haze. The reality was that I had more than enough before me. Its best that I focus my energies elsewhere and live in the moment. I've become overly sensitive to planning for the future and it's not proving to be as beneficial as I have convinced myself it would be.

5. I need to fix my bike and ride again on a regular basis. Actually, I may need to replace my bike, either way, I need to burn some energy.

6. It's disappointing when you come to a juncture and find that your regular travel companions are no longer fun to have along for the ride.

7. I want my next tattoo soon but soon is relative and wants are finicky foreigners. They show up without warning and rarely have kind words for the space where they land. Often their complaining gets them into fist fights with needs, the locals who don't take kindly to less than kind words.

8. The closest I get to a happy ending is shaving my head. I want my long hair though, it takes what seems like forever to grow. The methodical removal of these curly follicles leaves my scalp smooth as a baby's bottom and affords me a space in the continuum void of constant demands on my offerings.

9. Its been said that absence makes the heart grow fonder. It's also been argued that such is complete nonsense. I've stood on both sides of the argument, proudly. This time however, I find my space is on the sideline. It's absence and what it does will be assessed by what it gives birth to once it passes.

10. I despise the name of the group, mainly because I'm tired of blackness in America being framed by drugs, violence, oppression, etc. That aside, Cocaine 80s - The Pursuit EP is pretty damn good.

Excuse my charisma, chilled lemon spritzer, rocks not neat, this is summer not winter.

2011-06-27T15:36:00.003-06:00

1. My ever evolving understanding of masculinity in the American context, as that is where I am based and where I make my observations, has a recurring awareness of restraints and adherence to limits. The continuing designation between the civilized and the savage is refined when the former exercises restraint where the latter does not. Restraint.

2. Summer fail : Neighborhood bar in New Orleans with a booze sponsored event & a broken AC. Definitely won't tell anyone how to run their business but that's not the way to have customers return.

3. Last week, my pride took a hit. I'm well aware of the absence of respect modernity has fostered amongst us. This decline in interpersonal interactions has in part been aided by the expansion of interpersonal communication systems. You can imagine my disgust when an engagement I arranged was essential canceled within 2hrs of the agreed time. I was only made aware of the cancellation because I need to switch venues at the last minute. If there were no need for the change, I would've been standing there holding the bag. It was my best interest to distance myself from that person permanently, and I did.

4. If you ask specific questions, you'll be afforded the answers you seek. That's no pseudo Masonic riddle or saying, its factual.

5. Essence Music Festival is this weekend & I'm doing everything in my power to make sure that I'm far away from this gathering as possible. If I didn't work downtown, I wouldn't be bothered with it at all. I'm packing my lunch from home and doing my best to leave work as soon as we finishing up to avoid traffic. If the heat weren't as life changing as it is, I'd take the streetcar in just to avoid the confusion.

6. Air strikes on Palestine, a warrant for Qaddafi's arrest that is probably a bounty on his head, Iran is flaunting their missle systems, unrest in Rawanda, N. Nigeria, Greece is beyond broke, China owns even more US debt, France miraculously has billions to invest in nuclear power, tuition hikes in Puerto Rico, GOP is seriously selecting the dumbest, incompetent politician in their party as a presidential candidate for 2012, its raining like a banshee outside right now, Wal-Mart heiress is opening a massive museum in Arkansas later this year while her company maintains some of the most repressive & discriminatory practices of any major American employer, Alabama places a bounty on the heads of undocumented workers while GA considers prison labor (slave labor once you look at prison demographics) to save fledgling Agriculture economy, 4 million American homes near foreclosure. If making myself intimately aware of the details behind these headlines is what constitutes being informed, I'm going to need medical grade anti depressant marijuana made available wherever newspapers are sold.

7. You would be amazed where you find empathy in your darkest hours. Absolutely amazed, suspect of people's intentions but amazed nonetheless.

8. A Marine, clearly a younger one, asked me last week how to go about dressing the part and looking his best. More specifically, how could his style emulate my own. My initial thought was to tell him " Die & come back into a middle class family value system with little money. Make a habit of buying clothes with less than $50 twice a year for 15 yrs and then spend the next 6 years working to buy all that you wanted but couldn't afford." Instead, I encouraged the young man to scour Esquire and GQ, paying close attention to the ads and features & use those as a template wherever he did his shopping. He'd develop a sense of personal style once he noticed the pieces to which he was regularly drawn.

9. I see you young mothers out there, giving birth to children because you had a moral dilemma about terminating a pregnancy you couldn't afford. Round of applause for bucking the system & owning your autonomy!! Here's to those dreams you have to raise a family, hope all that suspended potential doesn't lose its potency when you decide to go back to the world of work, putting 50+ hrs into a career and heaven knows how much into being a parent. Salutations to your sperm donor turned partner turned ex-knight-in-shining-armor when you realize that he really didn't want a family, just a reserved space to bury his bone.

10. I owe the day a more complete list of accomplishments in an effort to settle this debt sooner than later, I'm going to chug a 5hr energy drink after work.

Summer Slump

2011-06-23T17:22:00.002-06:00

1. It's far less than wise to be rude to the person who sets your barber's appointment book. It has the potential to leave you looking less than presentable for much longer that necessary.

2. I have come to a conflicted sense of political and social awareness recently. The world over is filled with reports of revolts, uprising, revolution suppressions, etc yet my recurring primary concern remains how do I provide food for myself. At the risk of being apathetic, I'm most concerned with the food on my plate.

3. Her presence induces my smile and that is sufficient.

4. Rest in peace, Hawaiian Sophie. You served me well over the years, a man couldn't ask more from a bow tie.

5. The American Librarian Association is in town this week. I know some wild librarian nerd orgy ish will happen during this conference. Why you ask, because there's only so much sexual tension you can exhaust while administrating a house of knowledge.

6. Comedians that entertain without employing profanity possess an extreme amount of talent and restraint. I'm still a fan of a less than PG set as long as it isn't a gratuitous amount of profanity.

7. << that's the God hour if you follow the teachings of the school housed in the building next to the Apollo.

Mason Jar Shot Glass

2011-06-11T09:23:00.002-06:00

My tax dollars hard at work
as the orange glow guides
mosquitoes across legs,
round thighs
over kneecaps and sandal straps
while my hands are forced to settle on nice hips and sweet lips.
My eyes stalking ears as they spy on a neck shrouded in new growth.
Breaths shorter than quick glances
cool the night air,
while sighs exchanged relay
pieces of sincerity in the moment.
Patience.
We ignore numbers,
double digit directives
that provide boundaries.
Sweet nothings murmured
while the neighbor completes
his old fashioned journey home.
The shuffling of his smooth soled shoes tapping against
light poles and garbage cans.
No compass to consult
he verifies his destination
guessing at the shape of his front door while scouring his pocket for keys
under the orange glow
of the street light,
his tax dollars hard at work.

Be rude, I'm ignoring you anyways.

2011-06-06T09:33:00.001-06:00

1. The Devil knows more from being old than from being the Devil - Mexican Proverb.

2. I think I'm becoming a bit of a film snob because nothing that's available at the big box movie houses captures my attention. This is mildly disappointing because I spent many summers as a kid in the movie theatre. Not some old world building filled with charm, closer to an old suburb special with so so carpet and a cold AC. Those were good times though.

3. I was only thinking of a book and you mentioned a whole publishing house. I like that.

4. It's such a waste of potential when I encounter a young mind hell bend on dramatic social change that refuses to engage the text of well known theorists. You will not come to an understanding significant enough to carry you through the dirty work of existing in opposition to a larger system if you fail to study critically.  You're constant need to voice an opinion makes it known that you have much still to learn.

5. I could use a proverbial kick in the ass but the shoe that I'd normally employ is attached to a foot that I haven't heard from in awhile. Which means I'll be overcoming this moment of motivational deficiency on my own.

6. I need to purge my iPod. Between the duplicate songs and some overall quality issues, I may be able to free up 5gb. It's not a whole lot but it's a start.

7. I rememberd my leather bracelet was still on after I was in the shower for 5 minutes yesterday. It's been reduced to a leather strap on my keys.

8. "Keep your hands out of that umbrella can. There's much more than umbrellas in there. I don't care it's raining hard enough to make the Morton Salt girl nervous, don't touch the that can" an excerpt from a conversation between my brother and I regarding parenting and extent to which one will consider going to protect family.

9. If asked, I will always relay the truth as I know it regarding the situation. However, it remains your the responsibility to request it.

10. I recall several years ago making a new years resolution to be more upfront and honest. It's the only one I've ever kept. The joy of speaking my mind in the moment is that even if I don't recall everything I say to the letter, if resonates as coming from my stream of consciousness, then I probably said it.

11. There will always be something remarkably appealing about a woman who takes her coffee consumption seriously. This is completely different from an addiction to Starbucks, which means that you're hooked on processed sugars. It probably had a lot to do with growing up in a port city that is home to several coffee roasters.

Guacamole for Everyone!!!

2011-05-24T18:16:00.006-06:00

1. Are you sleeping next to the shrine?? I made my pallet over, and I don't wanna sleep next to it at all.

2. I've been attempting to detach myself from somethings for awhile and only recently have I achieved my goal. Theres no need for public celebration, as the abundant cynics would dismiss my delay as a development deficit.

3. Man, I got this real deal hippie friend, less about the dope more about the spiritual experience. She takes the most random of photos with some of the weirdest looking people but I like it. The photos, I don't know. She leads this very mysterious but remarkably open life.

4. Raisin Bran Crunch >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>Honey Bunches of Oats

5. As I sipped a cup of over roasted and consequently over sweetened coffee Sunday morning, I realized that I had no complaints about the cup whatsoever. My disdain was trumped by one mere fact : It was a free cup of coffee. I am a sucker for a free cup of coffee, as long as it's not courthouse jury duty room coffee, or gas station coffee.

6. Theres nothing worse than realizing you've paid too much for breakfast. My intention was to break the fast from last night & to expose my beloved ten year old brother to breakfast that wasn't processed and pre-shaped. He opted for French Toast, disappointed to discover that this was made from French Bread that was sliced on an angle. My Costa Rican breakfast was good, cheese over scrambled eggs on a bed of brown rice toped with fresh avocado & plantain slices. It was all good until I looked at the bill and discovered that 8oz of OJ cost $5 retail. Thats also the cost of an ENTIRE Gallon at the grocery store. Take away lesson from this experience, wake up an hour earlier and make your own breakfast that way you can put gas money in the tank instead of on the table.

7. If I owned Hell and Texas I'd rent out Texas and live in Hell - General Sheridan

8. Have you ever had project that was due and the approaching deadline was insufficient motivation for you get things done. Really,cause thats exactly where I'm at right now.

9. Espadrilles are the business. It's the comfort of a sandal without looking like you really don't care about getting anything done.

Shorts all day & all night!

2011-05-24T13:38:00.005-06:00

1. I've a sixth sense that I'm reaching minute 10 of 15 re: my charm in a new exchange. Lets hope my knowledge aggregation skills keep me relevant. I don't doubt that they will but I'm humble enough to hope.

2. I still don't understand the pricing logic for men's clothes. Yes, the large portion of men shop infrequently because they collectively find the task laborious and rife with an abundance of options that need not be made available. That accounted for, updating a wardrobe, in a very minimalist manner shouldn't easily near one to the $600 range. Not only is that absurd, it's not even the great pieces, just the "basics".

3. I went to one of my preferred watering holes last night for an engagement. In the event the party joining me had been lackluster, I might have been inclined to never return there again. The service was the worse it's ever been. I'm no "Mr. Consumer" who voices every gripe ever birthed from a less than desirable commercial transaction but the more I recall the night, the more inclined I am to make a call and voice my disappointment. Then again, who's really disappointed at a bar because are you not their for the inebriation and the conversation it gives birth to during you visit?

4. I'm going to revert to making only good decisions even though the bad ones birth better stories. They also tend to depend heavily on the presence of at least one supporting and enthusiastic member.

5. Theres a slight potential that I may be a contributing writer to a new blog in the near future. I'll keep the collective posted on those developments.

6. I'm awaiting the proof copy of my upcoming book Bowties & Socks. I'll announce when the final version has clear the press and will be ready for purchase. There may even be a launch party.

7. These service industry off days suck horribly. Middle of the week, I'm available to do whatever, when nothing is going on but Friday-Sun is my Mon-Wed. I feel like I'm missing out on a lot and it needs to end sooner than later. Alright I'm done. I'm grateful for consistent employment, I'm just not a fan of quality of life sacrifices.

8. Since the city I grew up in and the city I currently live are geographically the same but economically and culturally different, I'm going to use local restaurant reviews to relearn the landscape bka "be a tourist in my hometown". I'll (re)visit local attractions but the restaurant experiences will be more accessible given my schedule. No proper itinerary, I'm just going to make a list and check items off one by one.

9. I don't understand the American experience to have arrived at understanding that is post-racial, or beyond moral judgement assessments based primarily on a person assumed ethnic background and the stereotypes associated with it. The whole black president thing has really gone over to well and he's been in office for two years.

What I will go on the record and say is this: There are plethora of cultural difference between any two people in a given space that allows for immigration, whether it be sanctioned by a governing body or not. The important thing is to place those unique identifiers in perspective relative to the exchange in which they are observed/experienced and to base the bulk of your assessment on that which you have observed first hand. In doing this, it remains of the utmost importance to not give way to emotional influences. Emotions are valid and to be respected but their less than stable nature prevents them from being factored into logically sound evaluations of anyone who is not an intimate member of your life.

10. I've been charged with watching The Wire in it's entirety asap. I've no idea how I'll make that happen but since I've managed to avoid conversations about the show for this long, I suppose I can oblige this request

Sun washed everything!!!

2011-05-22T14:40:00.002-06:00

1. Obama got a little carried away thinking Netenyahu was going to agree to '67 borders just because he said its long been time to end the conflict.
1a. Qaddafi's tape >>>>>>>>>>> bin Ladebn tapes.

2. The simple sno-ball (akin to a sno-cone for my visitor who haven't made it down yet) was clearly boring the local foodies. Confectioner's traditional fruit & candy inspired offerings were not enough, so some brilliant Food Network fan decides to offer a sour pickle flavored sno-ball. Have I tried it, hell no! Will I just to confirm that it is a horrible idea in conception & execution, I haven't decided yet.

3. Roy Ayer's Everybody Loves the Sunshine is a favorite of mine. It also induces a slight chuckle thanks to the marvels of modern technology.

4. After years of debating, I have procured a pair of white pants. No, not painter's pants, white jeans to be specific. Lets see how well execute this ensemble.

5. I began including a reference to a significant historical figure when introducing myself to ensure that I wouldn't have to repeat my name again. Apparently, said neumonic device comes across as charming.

6. I looked at my running to do list this morning while having my coffee. It occurred to me that perhaps I'd bitten off more than I could chew. It also occurred to me that I need a touch of stress to ensure overall productivity.

7. I'm no celebrity stalker but there must be some way within the confines of the law & western codes of conduct that I can have a personal audience with Sade during her visit to New Orleans without shelling out the monetary equivalent of my soul. Given the current exchange rate, I don't believe that amountvif currency is even moved between banks.

8. Some silly ass white man publishes a study declaring black women unattractive and the digital world goes ape shit. Have the masses paid attention to all these cream colored babies running around here?? Have you looked at the recent ad campaigns for Tommy Hilfiger,
Gap, J Crew, etc?? Looks like black women are doing just fine to me. Of course I don't agree with his assertations & I'm not compelled to challenge them. His research is completely tainted with bias, his data sets are questionable, & sampling pool no doubt reflects his bias perfectly. In all of my life, I've never been drawn to classical notions of Western beauty, as they were often in direct opposition to my reality. At this phase of my journey, I evaulate beauty on a case by case basis. All women are beautiful, some I find more attractive that others. Either way, my opinion isn't law. Neither is the one he slathered over research.

9. I think the notion for me to have 6 pack this summer as a part of my new years resolution was birthed in the haze of holiday cocktail consumption. I will however work my way through some micro-brewery offerings this summer. Homage to the other 6pk.

10. Flavellas included, I really want to see Brazil soon. Not sure how that'll happen but it needs to soon.

God Bless Diversity!

2011-05-07T15:45:00.003-06:00

1. I've been told these times build character, that they enrich the soul by imparting life lessons. They've matured me beyond my years and now I struggle to see the surface for constantly examining the implications of the ideas and attitudes that create these scenes.

2. We don't agree, rather, I don't agree on the matter. I present my objective views on the matter and the logic that guides you contradicts all that's been presented. My spent breath resonates as wasted and you leave to do as you desire.

3. Can you survive against all odds?

4. I've washed my hands of you, cleansed my laptop of you. Yet if I look at a calendar too long, I can recall conversations we had years ago around the date my eye falls on. It's as though my mind won't completely rid itself of you despite my desires. Despite your cold shoulder, your indifference, your absolute absence of compassion, my mind still finds something of value in the memory of you. It is in these moments that I despise my memory.

5. The seasons shift in their own manner. We observe the differences yet we can't completely know the changes. We speculate heavily & compensate trained scientist well to compose elaborate explanations but we do not know completely. Who am I lament my ignorance, for it is non-unique?

6. All the lofty shit aside, the evaluation is always focused on resources and experience.

7. He spouts a wealth of classical thought & precisely constructs even the simplest arguments but my brother always ask for my opinion on his ensemble before he steps out for the night.

8. Years ago, when I came across Bjork, I turned my head. "No way I'm listening to this woman & her weird ass noises". Only recently have I come to see the error in that assessment.

9. Soon I will publish a collection of my writings. I have no idea what the reception of the work will be and that concerns me most. My habit towards strong criticism has me reluctant to even send it to press. I have friends who are excited about it, family too. I just wonder if a stranger will purchase a copy and find enjoyment in it. I don't seek validation in others but I'm human. The thought of someone reading it and lamenting the money spent on it keeps me awake some nights.

10. I sat down to read and began writing this post. Chewy jumped up and stretched out beside me. He's laying here next me snoring, legs stretched out. Now, I don't want to get up. I've become one of those people who become attached to their pets. I found them weird & now I find myself in their ranks.

11. Osama was killed recently. We didn't have the decency to do the job in daylight. That's very old world of me but we could have at least done the deed in light of day.

12. Wu-Tang Clan Forever! (Aight, damn near forever. The Wire on wax gets old after awhile but the jawns still knock 10 yrs later!!) Who go the connect on the different color Wallies for real?? I want the Tan/Blue joints Raekwon was rocking in a photo I came across.

13. He didn't believe me when I told him that skipping out on the night scene wasn't a loss. Last night, he discovered for himself how much a gamble it is on a table with loaded dice.

14. At work, I'm reminded that the masses seek knowledge that affords some semblance of status within commercial transactions. Knowledge for the sake of knowledge is often left unexplored.

15. Mother's Day is tomorrow here in the States. I find no need to celebrate it. My appreciation & love do not need a designated day to be manifested and expressed. Besides, love is much more than $60 flowers & a trip out to dinner. The meal will cease to satisfy and flowers will lose attractive presentation.

16. It's Kentucky Derby Day, where people don their finest apparel to watch horse races in the name of maintaining tradition. I guess imitating the Royal Crown never gets old.

Did I tell you bout the time??

2011-05-02T00:03:00.001-06:00

1. I've become agnostic. Perhaps, I've been here for sometime and didn't realize that i was. Regardless, I'm still developing a sense of what it means & how I'm going to verbalize my developing understanding.

2. I thought after x, I'd be able to do y with more focus. Not so. I'm still mulling over the essence of what is necessary to complete x, which I'm realizing I haven't yet accomplished. This still leaves y unattended. Hence a (new) dilemma.

3. In my youth, I wished for a summer where I would be able to read as much as I wanted. No camps to attend, no yard work to do, nothing. This summer looks like that dream a little, I just wish the circumstances were much different.

4. On the way to movies with my brother last week, we were discussing a long bankrupt local grocer, Canal Villiere & the many time we walked the mile between there and home when we were much younger. The discomfort that was at the essence of those experiences came back instantly, leaving us both speechless. Those moments helped form who we've become as men and I'll never disown them but I'm definitely not opening that drawer again any time soon.

5. While making groceries last night, I ran into a friend I hadn't seen in awhile. She was a sight for sore eyes. I'm intrigued. The rest will be what it is. (that grammatical error was deliberate)

6. Office politics are ridiculous. It can be a game of chess with checker pros or it can be a game of chess with an old black man in the park at the concrete tables

7. I respect spontaneity for all that it offers, I'm still working towards the place where I can appreciate it. Something about "not having a plan" even a skeleton plan, rubs me the wrong way.

8. "This a skeleton crew tonight, against these brothers we ain't the 3 Musketeers, we're the 3 Stooges" <----Context free quote from a New Orleans night

9. I don't believe this Osama killing media blitz & will assert that something much larger is taking place while we celebrate the death of a man who's importance diminished over a decade ago.

10. Opened a 24 at 1am. Bad idea, really bad idea.

Excuse me Senor, it is soo dry here!

2011-03-30T23:54:00.002-06:00

1. The older I get, I more I understand how people develop an absolute hatred & distolerance for organized religion.

2. Finally gave in & bought some Tom's last week. They're comfortable, any one whose worn canvas sneaker can attest. They are also much less than practical for the demands of my schedule would allow.

3. Consistent clear communication would change the world.

4. There was a quote by Thomas Strohm(?) that I admired for years "I have earned my pain but I do not deserve my tears". My ignorance of the original context accounted for, I've lost admiration for it. I suspect

5. Just cause you can't understand him, it don't mean that he's nice. It just means that you can't all the bullshit that he writes - S. Carter on Nas. It also applies to 1 in 7 books published recently.

6. Respect the moment, for it alone holds truth. While those elements of truth may apply to later moments, they should not be understood as absolute truths the apply to all moments.

7. I'd like an extensive collection of saddle shoes, who wants to get things started by tracking down a Tan/Green pair Cole Haan has miracously sold out of on their website?!

8. I('ve).missed.you & no amount of face to face time will rewind time & take me to the moment in time when that which I miss was given life. Oddly enough, I'm ok with that.

9. May the Divine bless the place holders for their lot lacks appeal & their devotion seldom sees rewards.

10. We better kick ass at this conference, seriously.

Dishes from feasting on food for thought

2011-03-26T11:42:00.002-06:00

1. The exterminator is a chill as dude, when he ain't spray poison all over the place.

2. Jose Torres-Tama performance was amazing. It was assertive, aggressive, compassionate, & at some points comedic. It's amazing how the phrase "Illegal Immigrant" only focuses on group of such people.

3. I respect the notion of a uniform, it makes things a tad simpler in the morning. However, it's remarkably disappointing to see throngs of adult men bound to the blue shirt/blue jeans, blue or white shirt/khakis, & the polo shirt/khakis combo. Sadly enough, these men genuinely don't see a thing wrong with such subversive conformity.

4. Where are the moderately attractive women hiding? There's appears to be an abundance of the respective extremes, but shortage of middle ground. It's like having your mouth set on a sandwich but you walk into a bakery, not a deli. Being a resident of said middle ground, I'm sure I didn't move into a foreclosed subdivision.

5. After 200+ yrs of cultural blending, Americans are still remarkably fearful of racial, cultural, & religious others. The world will not end if everyone at the family reunion isn't the same color people, get over it.

5a. Said Americans are not the Original Americans rather, the immigrant masses who have been divorced by either desire or design from their cultural heritage.

6. All I wanted was an appetizer, a little something to appease the hunger. A degree of amusement must reside in watching a man wrestle with his appetite. Lo, I shall satisfy my hunger.

7. Iconography & imagery accounted for, I find a good bit non-indigenous peoples tattoos remarkably predictable and consequently void of excitement.

8. As my understanding of critical literary theory grows (it'll take plenty of time & some steroids before I'm comfortable with it), I find it remarkably difficult to prevent any experience from being critiqued.

9. Stress induced weight loss retains a silver lining, it's still weight loss. It becomes industrial grade silver when you really don't have the fat to spare.

10. It amuses me to watch people seek validation of self in commercial transactions, as though they cease to exist in the moments between these transactions. Resource exchanges validate A role you play in a given system, not YOUR role in a given unless you're wedded to capitalism. In which case, you literally need these transactions to verify that you are experiencing one elaborate ass dream.

11. While I understand the essentialist inclination to cut a direct path to that which you interact with in order to ingest, retain & readily recall large quantities of information, this often results the rapid dissemination of partial truths. In particular, the understanding that a hanging & a lynching are the same act. Lynchings leave remains, hangings leave bodies.

Lynchings take hours & involve methodical torture aimed at inflicting enough pain to bring the victim to the brink of death (via shock or blood loss) but the torturers cease before said line is crossed. Most lynchings involve castration, removal of appendages, and constant beatings. Hangings tend to be a bit more direct, sans torture. Also, lynchings historically were reserved for non-white males while hangings are tend to have greater demographic variety.

12. Be mindful of speech that is binary in nature. It reduces the subject to either/or resulting a limited problem solving approach being employed. The more options considered, the greater possibility that the solution arrived at will be more comprehensive in nature.

2+hr layover = Meet me @ the bar!

2011-03-23T23:28:00.002-06:00

1. Pulled a Larry Byrd without a foul rose up snatched my Guinness off the ground & hit him with a pound and told homie hold it down - AZ

2.I respect the distance for it preserves the integrity of the moment, it aims to allow nothing to interrupt the truth. I miss you though & there's no substitute for that. So instead I tread forward facing the pass, sights locked on the difference as the whole system becomes a clear image.

3. Mary came by today & she sat with Moms for hours. They talked around each other like three decades hadn't pass that they were friends throughout. She filled the cracks in her voice when I asked how was everything & I pretend I couldn't hear the putty.

4. Modern man needs the wilderness, he needs to know that he can throw all of his might at nature & it not even ripple past where stands without him harnessing fire. He needs to exert his strength so he can discover his limits & view the blessing that is a boundary.

5. The revolutions have been televised & you clowns are too busy worrying about Chris Brown & Rihanna. The notions that became ideas that gave birth to ideologies which men & women would give life and limb for were not born in some TV studio. It happened in the streets, amongst the people.

6. I don't place much value in critical acclaim & the support of fans, for taste are fickle and often change with such regularity, they don't appear to exists in isolation. That is, they are only present as a response to external stimuli.

7. It's been said that I've lived the life of a man 10 years my senior. I can only hope that I carry myself in a manner that reflects wisdom acquired during that decade.

8. I could use a weekend away at the beach with Chewy, a beautiful swimsuit model, & a good bit of passion fruit.

9. I finally found a large bottle of Geritol I bought 2 months ago. Let's see if I can't make up for lost time.

10. Ugly girls quiet, pretty girls ride - Gucci!

11. Memoirs help maintain perspective but some these recent reads (for class) are the most depressing shits I've ever come across.

12. I just bought new flip flops last year, hemp jawns with recycled tire for the soles, all the way from Adidas Abba. I'll be replacing them jawns before the cool nights become a thing of the past.

13. My favorite pair of jeans are some Levi's 569s that must be 5yrs old. They don't get washed often, mainly aired out for several days. They've been altered because my inseam isn't a rack standard & they fit like a tailor cut them. At $50, they are reason enough for brand loyalty. You can keep the designer denim.

14. Open Your Eyes - Pusha T: Post-Modernism set to a soul sample.

15. For the love of strawberries, how did that jewel of a scribe just walk off without hearing the story I was aiming to write. It's all good, we self publish over here. Not for kudos, not for conversation filler, we do it because once it's done we can speak of more pressing matters.

Give'em Guinness til they finished

2011-03-12T13:16:00.001-06:00

1.The Cougars are prowling across the city now. Guess I need to ignore my demographic & see what's good with these wild cats.

2. Aye na baybae, whasshampn witcha?

3. Finally made it to the Orange Couch for coffee courtesy of a series of road blocks. It's cool, like chic cool. I'm feeling it though, it's chill. I suspect this how the Village felt during it's hey day.

3a. In light of said visit, I need to rewrite my business plan.

4. Theres a remarkable calm about Sunday morning when it doesn't involve going to church or work.

5. By having less, you have more freedom.

6. Don't expect anything less than the most, even if it appears that the least is all you'll acquire.

7. Much love to bad decisions!!

8. On the humble, I'm a boost your social life. No, I'm not a "Big Deal", more of a Developing Asset.

9. My mans is pregnant with twins, well, he & his wife are expecting twins. He crossed my mind this morning, & all I can do is hope for the best. I pray I never know that reality.

10. I'm looking forward to the day when I can say that I've accomplished goals I set years ago.

Buffalo China

2011-02-21T15:36:00.002-06:00

1. I retract the declaration made recently to "let them see a proper asshole at work". It remains highly unlikely, that a generally well natured man as I, could ever begin to emulate the truest essence of a "proper asshole". It appears I made assumptions based on less than solid observations and experienced as a result of said observances, quite more than a few lack luster forays into the dating world. The better approach, most importantly the one I intend on taking, is to focus my efforts on refining my understanding of the world. I'll leave the romantic endeavors to the romantics.

2. & it's amazing, that I can still sing this song, so simply, about you.

3. A few notes on etiquette:

• When invited to grab a cocktail with some one, you should ask when the invitation is extended whether or not you may bring along a friend. You do not make mention of someone else joining you after being notified that your host is running a tad behind schedule.

• You do not make a booty call sans conversation, at least 1 day before hand, that clarifies the friendship has the potential to have "benefits". If it isn't understood to be a an even exchange, someone is going to feel as though they are being used. That never ends well.

• Man bashing, particularly Black Man bashing, is remarkably out-dated and punitive. If the men you're attracting aren't the ones you want attracted to you, you need to reassess your energy. Don't invite me, a Black Man, to anything that's going to result in man bashing. It's a poor use of the feminist critique & a waste of my energies. Address a pathology, criticize an ethos but don't tell me that "niggas ain't shit" in your best lackluster academic cliche' riddled rant. I'm neither impressed, amused, or enlightened.

• A lack of planning on your part does not constitute an emergency on my part.

4. I've never been one to get all excited about telling people what I do. Not because I'm ashamed of anything, hell I make my bad decisions with conviction. More often than not, I feel as though I'm setting up expectations, which are the building blocks of disappointment. I don't have the least bit of remorse for failing to meet anyone's expectations, but I despise the feeling of being let down by someone whose potential you have faith in. I'd much rather surprisingly do something noteworthy than constantly discuss its development. In short, do what you do, don't discuss who you are.

5. In the end, we will all do what we want & still lament the outcome.

6. I took a census of my shirts & have come to the realization that unless a mass immigration occurs soon, the current home of my occasionally engaging presentation will become the permanent home of one boring looking Brother.

7. I suspect it's known as a gift from the divine. One of those things you can't return to sender & can't seem to live without using often. By often, I mean constantly. Plus there's that whole "to whom much is given, much is required". Thing is, I didn't request any of this, soo how we gonna work this out?? Oh yea, that's right, I'll just have to make it work.

8. I've developed a strong affinity for leather shoes that lack laces. Yea, leather slippers. Not just the house variety though, pretty much anything I can wear in the elements without having to tie.

Wooden Light Bulbs

2011-02-14T20:01:00.002-06:00

1. Congratulations to the people of Egypt!!! Goal achieved without direct Western assistance.

2. Some days, I'd rather abandon all responsibilities & just cool with Chewy. Since childhood has passed & retirement is a ways off, I'll have to table that idea.

3. Valentine's Day is here & I'm ok with not having one. I could wax poetically about how much of a bullsh!t holiday it is, about how the commercialization of eros has undermined the American family structure, etc...I won't. I'm a man & even though its a wack day in principle, it drove me nuts for years knowing I didn't have one & could look forward to receiving nada. I've moved on, I believe.

4. It bears repeating: it's not what you say, it's how (word choice) you say it.

5. I'm reading Zissner's On Writing Well & learning quite a bit about the craft.

6. ballonboyd.tumblr.com <--give it go why don't cha!

7. Mike: $5 million sounds like a decent amount to me.
Me: I'd spent $15 million in my head when I was 14.
Mike: Damn, you're right. It isn't much.

8. Listening to a young Irishman sing a native jig is quite entertaining. Especially when they're a few drinks down.

9. Can we get much higher?!

10. The Allure of the game keeps calling my name.

Med Roast & Almond Chocolate Croissants

2011-02-06T11:40:00.002-06:00

1. Now your draped in chocolate, taste the opportunity.

2. I respect the assessment "it's not you, its the market" but part of me doesn't agree with it completely. I should succeed in any market, regardless of the conditions. I'm born to win, remember.

3. "Yea bra, I stopped wondering (about that) long time ago".

4. Once I became aware that our state constitution allows for funding to be cut from education & health care first when a deficit occurs, I knew it was foolish to consider starting a family here.

5. Although I complete despise the commercial bullshit that is associated with Valentine's Day, I'm a bit ticked that I can engage in a discussion about it with my significant other because I have none.

6. Memoirs that cover traumatic experiences, if written well, have the profound effect of depressing me slightly. This makes finishing said memoir a chore.

7. Warhol?! Really?! Ok, that's cool but when it comes to scheduling face time, you're too busy??

8. When did the opinions of entertainer come to outweigh those intellectuals? Lil Wayne & Method Man make comments about only liking black women whose appearance is colloquially known as "red" & the blog world goes bananas over it. Regardless of whether these are informed opinions or the result of not challenging racist attitudes, its remains an issue of personal preference. Once you place them in the context, its no more significant than your playboy uncle's exploits.

9. I am a brown man, I will always look in pastels.

10. Mardi Gras 2011 is upon us & I could care less.

It is.

2011-01-24T23:27:00.003-06:00

1. John Mayer's song "Fathers" directly reminds every man that the women in his life were at some point daughters. Daughter that need(ed) love, attention, respect , & encouragement. I'm not interested in electro-shocking the dead horse of absentee fathers, but if you have daughters, God-daughters, nieces, sisters, etc make sure that they receive all the emotional support to become complete women who are able to engage in well thought out decision making exercises with confidence.

2. At times, I take pleasure in argument for the sake of argument. Occasionally, I'll even entertain such while I'm drinking. Just to see how long I can banter before the flood of alcohol removes some blood from my brain so my liver can knock out the sugar surplus. However, such experiences are usually relegated to arguments where I retain a vested interest, a proverbial dog in the fight. (If that offends you, you're welcomed to leave) I'll go on the record & state that I do not condone "gay marriage". Yes, it's an unpopular viewpoint, no I'm not homophobic.

3. Have you ever look through your contacts, realized your were remarkable indifferent towards the notion of holding a conversation with 95% of the people listed?? Yea, I'm long overdue for a different scene.

4. You shouldn't have to tell people what you do. Instead, it should be a puzzle they begin to solve while they talk with you. Don't tell me you're a visual artist, give me discrete indicators regarding your involvement in that arena. For the love of strawberries, surprise me!

5. The older you get, the more concerned you become with how exact your clothing fits. The baggy sweats are worn on days when leaving the house is not an option.

6. Grad school then something involving my hands. Leather tanning, cobbling shoes, wood working, something that develops a certain work ethic. Yea, that sounds like the plan.

7. Here I am thinking with all that noise, something would come it. In the end, it fell short of the expectations it present upon it's arrival. In laymens terms, cubic zirconia, all flash, no value.

8. Its apparent that I've read the same photo too often in the hopes that the thousand words presented would some how re-order themselves. If the Jews could read the writing on the wall without glasses, I'm sure I can do the same with them.

9. Discussions of happiness that ignore the significance of financial stability are the ramblings of idealistic young people whose affinity for romance has completely eclipsed their ability to follow logical discourse & to engage in critical reflection.

Texts abound & yet learning is at a standstill

2011-01-16T09:28:00.002-06:00

1. I woke up the other morning with a whirlwind of ideas passing through my mind as I reached for my glass of water. It was far too early to call anyone, so I spent part of my morning ritual talking to Chewy. Mind you, he only looked attentive in the moment I mentioned food.

2. Less than 30 days away from my least favorite holiday and I'm dreading it already.
I can't stand shopping for anything during this stretch because those crappy decorations abound.

3. Even though it's a huge investment that constantly needs more funding, I'm quite excited to hear my friends talk of buying a house soon.

4. There are times when the use of "tact" greatly undermines the urgency & the essence of the message. Ahhh, the things we do out of concern for our fellow (wo)man.

5. It's been requested that I restructure the blog. In particular, that I post more critically engaging essays about current events. I'm reviewing the idea and have considered even starting a 2nd blog for said purposes. I'll make an announcement either way in the near future.

6. Do we really need to get together or is that just the polite thing to say? Companionship trumps comradere for the record.

7. The bet remains active but I don't think it matters any more. Let's call the whole thing off.

8. I didn't speak on the matter because the days of you needing me to have long passed. Yes, I'm assessing your needs.

9. I tasted Potcheen for the first time last weekend. While I don't condone the use of the term never, I can't possibly envision one good decision following the consumption of any significant quantity of this Irish Moonshine. The flat bottom of a shot glass hosted the 2cm layer known here as a taste.

10. Your only demand is that my potential was not neglected. I'm working on it.

11. Chips & Cheese w/ salsa = Top 5 Snacks!

Lemon top notes, honey finish

2011-01-09T21:05:00.002-06:00

1. Heavy rain calms my mind down considerably. Soo much that drinking during heavy rain has the potential to knock me out.

2. Don't play around with your significant other for 7 yrs. If ya'll ain't made it to marriage phase by then end that ish w/ a bang & walk away smiling.

3. You've got to be comfortable being alone, not just capable of doing it. You need to able to come home on cold night, wanting to cuddle with another human being & realizing that life will not fail to continue should you pass the night alone. Unfortunately, the lesson takes awhile for some to master.

4. Didn't anticipate the night taking such a turn, twice. I suppose a more discrete approach would have been effective, but I wasn't in the mood for such. Tis a shame we were on different pages.

5. My mixologist>>>>>>>>anyone you can call.

6. Growing up in a financially rocky but emotionally stable house does wonders for your mental endurance when you're building your future and being 12hrs away from broke is mildly unavoidable.

7. Earn your scars & cherish your wounds for lessons lie in both. It would be less than conversation minded to ignore either.

Black Pens with blue ink in browned fingers

2011-01-05T23:49:00.004-06:00

1. Fell for the hypebeast, saw Tron, & got a movie pass from the manager because the disc was scratched. Funny how life balances out.

2. The only people who can do the most without breakfast are super heroes. I've tried on numerous occassions and the results are pretty lack luster.

3. What's the word on parents who bring their children in on the conversation regarding how they (children) are raised? Since when did parents cease being dictators, making it clearly known where boundaries reside? How can you expect to raise a generation that genuinely respects it's elders when you allow children to determine how their world will actually opperate?

4. What if the pretense was abandoned and we just played it out as it developed?? No play making, no strategies, just moving forward with it as it became clearer what it was. Perhaps such a luxury is the material of children's dreams and has no business crossing my mind, certainly less business clearing my lips.

5. Every day evens up, you just wait. Even the garbage can gets a steak.

6. This Huckleberry Finn censuring nonsense is ridiculous. The text was produced in a historical context and no one should alter said to appease the sensitivities of a modern audience. How are future generations going to develop a complete understanding of their past as the historical record is being rewritten.

7. It's a new year so I think it time to clear one of my lists. No need in procrastinating any longer

Cheese Eggs, OJ, & Yellow Grits

2010-12-20T02:20:00.003-06:00

1. Once you begin to develop a feminist understanding, especially as a man of color, it becomes very difficult to view things outside of that context. More often than not, the lens of scrutiny causes the most discomfort when you place your familial reality underneath it .

2. It's amazing the shit you'll accept when you think a dream has come to fruition, even if the dream isn't actualized in it's entirety. What kind of dream doesn't come true completely? It's unfortunate that fear & emotional issues prevented the possibilities from being explored completely, off paper, in the five dimensional world.

2a. Fuck niggas, bitches too, all I trust is my pride & this'll do.

3. The quickest way to compromise contentment is to introduce the situation to inquiry.

4. What's the score with the false friends?? It shouldn't be that much of a chore to maintain a vested interest in the person you declare your friend. It shouldn't take an act of congress for your emotional concern to manifest itself. If you lack a close connection with the whole range of your emotions, you should deny yourself friends until you get that sorted out.

5. As for Don't ask, Don't tell: Who you spend your free time with & how that time is spent is of no concern to me. I really don't care who you're sleeping with, just do your damn job beyond your best abilities. If your willing to die for this democracy, then step right on up & do just that. This rampant homophobia is ridiculous, truth be told, who you elect to have as an intimate partner is none of my business as long as they are a consenting adult (as defined by the state laws where the interaction initiates & occurs)

6. Be good at it! <<<understand that as best your mind allows

7. I've never understood the emotional bonds people develop with professional athletic teams. It's a completely one side experience in my opinion, with the spectator having the greatest investment. How does one become soo vested in an exchange governed by dictates of distance? Even if you buy seats on the field, the players don't know you unless you're there every game in the same seats. It's like falling in love with an animal at the zoo, no matter how strongly you feel, those emotions will never transcend that protective space.

8. Accept no shorts, produce no counterfeits, & selectly reply to inquiries. (#nyresolution)

9. I'm no medium but I'm relatively confident in my understanding of the cyclical realities of life. If I forecast something regarding your future, don't take it as gospel. Just consider that my understanding, on this issue, may transcend your own exponentially.

10. I find nothing more annoying than to listen to white men complain. More oft then not, they exists in a very privileged reality, void of consistency interruptions padded with a degree of normalcy that others regard as luxurious living. Respect the real struggle, Chuck & shut the fuck up.

11. You don't listen to hip-hop/rap music to develop a philosophy on life. You listen to apply to apply traditional thought to a context radically different from the one in which those ideas are formed. These sub-genres of music have yet to produce any theories or critical methods that withstand academic scrutiny, they do provide a context for understanding what occurs when a myriad of theories intersect each other. The discussion always comes from deciphering the conflict.

12. Instead of worrying about who that _____ fucking, go & get you some money (Wiz Khalifa) Easily the most substantive phrase I've ever heard cross his lips. Remember even a broken clock is right at two times in the day.

13. 808s & Heartbreaks was such a critically under appreciated album. It's riddled with raw emotion embedded in what the unaquainted ear (mind) understands as rambling.

14. I want to sit with a doppio, a chess set and kill the day with an old friend. I suppose we'll have to age a bit further to devote our time to battles void of a resource to acquire control over.

15. Always travel the street parallel to the main thoroughfare. It's there for that very reason.

16. It's never the memories I seek to destroy, for they are proof that I wasn't hatched in a laboratory. It's the recall sequences attached to some of those memories I'd love to obliterate. For without that sequence, the memories float around my subconscious life space station debris through the galaxy.

17. When your boss breaks out the good whiskey after work, park your heels. Sit & sip a bit for this moment is destined to not repeat itself.

18. Tis a shame most of this post will go unread, let alone under-discussed. Ah well, my writing is cathartic at times & such writing has no need for a captive, engaged, or concerned audience.

Where is the humidity?!

2010-12-13T20:43:00.002-06:00

1. Seriously, I live less than 100 miles from a large body of water & the humidity has hovered between 37-48%. This is some bullshat.

1a. There is indeed a limit to your love, much like a map with no ocean.

2. It's imperative to clear one's subconscious of any lingering doubts, desires, & disappointments before transitioning from one phase to another. It makes the arrival much smoother & allows one to focus all their energies on the present.

3. All beauty & no brains shorten much the courting game. All brains & no beauty absolves one from courting duties.

4. Make your own informed decisions, stand by those decisions, & dismiss any rebuttals to those decisions that are void of logic.

5. I've been reviewing my own understanding of the phrase "Only men can raise men". At one time, I believed in the notion whole heartedly, that only men can produce men. Then I was forced to acknowledge the men I knew that were raised in homes without their fathers, so I retracted my words. Then I considered that even though a man may not have been in the house, uncles, grandfathers, neighbors, hypes, etc were certainly still present. Their actions (or lack thereof) are as much as an influence as the man that one would call father. You seek out parity for whichever man you select as your own role model, to make sure his deeds are in line with the "norm" as you know it.

6. If you're not careful, your heart will get your mind trapped in a maze trying to figure out why something just won't happen.

7. Its time to brush up on some skills that haven't been used.

walk light & carry a tall staff

2010-11-29T14:41:00.002-06:00

1. Well, now that that's done & yes it's quite early, but trust me on this one. I'll take something brown & old on ice. Cheerio!!

2. She called & we walked thru the civilities before she proceeded to let me have a piece of her mind. No banned words, no front row seat to the resurrections promises. Her voice was calm, her breaths measured. My head hung in shame as though she stood before me.

3. The more I understand how it works, the less mystique lies in the whole of the experience. I'm very much a fan of the mystique and appreciate the enrapturing nature of the allure.

4. Once I take care of the people on my Christmas list, I'll be good. It's not that I don't want anything, it's that my most immediate need is one that I'll take care of soon.

5. Never underestimate the physiological effects of a physical place on your productivity. I once thought it foolishness until I started paying attention to how much was being accomplished at one venue vs another.

6. While dogs are not children & children are certainly not dogs, there exist some overlap, in my opinion, regarding the nature of social conditioning that need occur for both parties to engage in meaningful, positive interactions. The clear demarcation of boundaries & limits are needed for both entities. Children who develop into adults without a clear understanding & respect of boundaries often find themselves in friendships void of any substance. Dog who experience the same lack of discipline often monopolize & over run the lives of their owners.

7. The notion of "game" as it relates to dating has been significantly devalued in the technological era. There was a time when men were expected to wax poetically as a part of the introduction they presented to the woman whom held their interest. This younger generation relies very heavily on overlapping social circles, the disposable income of their parents, & delayed replies to messages to do what their sweet talking uncles did for years while picking the lint out of their pockets.

8. When your significant other hates one of your friends, you've several options, a) remove the significant other, b) remove the friend, c) try your hand at conflict resolution, d) ignore it and move forward. Given that a & b are bit drastic, d is a tad juvenile, c remains the most viable option. It can also be the most involved.

9. Cold hands, warm heart.
9a. Better late than never, but never late is better.

10. There are points when words fail to capture the essence of the moment. This is also the point when you realize that your lexicon could use an overhaul.

Scatter Plots

2010-11-19T21:17:00.002-06:00

1. Nothing is more pointless than saying hello,in passing, to a person whose calls you refuse to return. Save the civilities for high tea as I've no use for them.

2. There are things which no man is allowed the luxury of complaining about. So I'll move on to the next point.

3. There only remains one. One that may very well remain unattended, unreconciled, disconcerted & disconnected.

4. I'm considering law school. Not because I have some undying interest in mastering legal interpretation, not because I need the thrill of going to trial, not because I lust after some ridiculously large salary. I'm considering law school because the work is steady, the pay is family building friendly, & some days, I just prefer the pragmatic option.

5. Tracie Ellis Ross should you make it down to my fair city in the hopes of avoiding the paparazzi, do allow me the luxury of your company over a few drinks. Your boyfriend is welcome to play in traffic while the signal light is out, do tell him it's nothing personal. What's that you say, yes, the evening will be paparazzi free, scout's honor.

6. Although more research needs to be done, at some time in the distant future, when the time comes child birth, we're using a mid-wife. No, I'm not married nor is this up for debate.

7. I have 2 weddings to attend & 3 births to celebrate and 2011 isn't even here yet!

8. Tyler Perry's adaptation of For Colored Girls surprised me. I'm no fan of his catalog but I was very impressed with his handling of this piece. I'll watch it again soon to refine my critique.

No, they're not prayer beads.

2010-11-04T23:21:00.002-06:00

*These are actual Japa Mala beads

1. Many thanks & much love to all who celebrated my birthday. I'm still receiving cards & gifts which means I'm loved much. That holds much weight in my world.

1a. When I invite you to a gathering of my friends, don't attend if you plan on just sitting on the side w/ your friend and not engaging the group. If I wanted to bump into you & your home girl, I wouldn't have invited you out. I would have asked where you were partying tonight & met you there.

1b. Don't you ever, ever, ever waive a gift in front of the birthday boy & then tuck it away like it doesn't exists. I'm a gentleman so I'll behave accordingly but I know some less than gentlemanly men who aren't inclined to respond so kindly.

5. There comes a time when you should consciously & actively begin separating fiction from reality. This usually begins around the age of 12/13 or immediately afterward when puberty comes into full swing. This should be a standard practice by the time you reach age 22-27, not a novel notion you're still wrapping your understanding around.

3. The dog is well feed, but the master is hungry.

4. It's a hard day when you sit down to write & realize your muse no longer inspires. They're funny things, muses you know, certainly exchangable but definitely not replaceable.

2. See me, want me, give me, touch me, feed me, fuck me, love me, touch me this whole world is cold & ugly.

6. All Mac & Cheese is not created equally.

7. I wrestled with participating in the democratic process on Tuesday. My frustrations with the absence of tangible improvements delivered with in a timely manner almost keep me from the polls. I was persuaded, not emotional pleas of those who fought & died for my right to vote (good looking on the blood, sweat, & tears but more harm has come from that movement) but by an appeal to my intellect regarding the whole system. In sum, all of life's conflicts should be resolved by logic except those immediately involving the absence of physical life per some distraught soul with a weapon. At which point, fuck logic, make it out alive the best you can.

8. At the end of the day, your a good man & all of your reasonable request should be honored - COS, 'ppreciate ya much!

9. If you're not already, become comfortable with people expressing their love for you. Love comes in many forms & it does both parties involved a world of good being able to express the sentiment as well as knowing that you are indeed the objection of someone's care, concern, & affections.

9a. If we're not growing together, we really are growing apart. Love will tell you that plainly, without hesitation or reservation.

10. I satisfied my urge for hot wings today, the first bite was immediately a drastic disappointment. I wish I had left the urge unanswered.

11. Once I get custody of my inner child again, I'm setting a court date to rework this visitation schedule because the current one is an epic fail.

12. We've grown older, grown up, grown apart, & still have out grown the memories made before the growing had a chance to start.

13. 5 yrs ago, this time of month was an emotional roller coaster with no passenger restraints. I'd lost my childhood house, gained a sense of self, become legal in all 50 states, almost flew to Mexico on a smile, a if & a prayer, moved in with a friend who lived an hour away from said home, partied like a rock star w/ said friend & more friends to numb out the effects of what happened, & began. an exchange via Facebook that would leave a lasting impression on my soul much longer after she & I ceased to keep in touch.

I slept in a trailer sans electricity or heat for 3 days waiting to ride 9hrs back to my family for Thanksgiving. I woke up when the sun was high in the sky & went to sleep fully dressed (sans boots) as soon as the sun dropped.

I don't need to remember the anniversary, I've lived in the reality for five years.

It's my birthday!!

2010-10-28T11:53:00.003-06:00

Who going to make that cake happen for real?!

Are you here?

2010-10-25T22:23:00.002-06:00

1. Being on the receiving end of a drunk call is immensely entertaining when a) it's before 11pm & b) the caller's accomplices fight for caller allotted 2 mins of call time!

2. There is nothing I can compare, in my short life, to waking up out of sound sleep that I entered 4 hrs prior sans adrenaline and starting my day.

3. I earnestly want to hold out hope but in the end, I'm no fan of unrequited love. Far too many writers have two sentences in their bios referring to this matter, so there's no need for history to repeat itself.

4. You must always be self aware enough to assess your friendships & acknowledge those to which your contribution merely isn't enough. It's the civilized thing to do.

5. Where o where is my hair brush??

6. Put'em all in a room, provide beverages, & see what happens next is the outline for most social gatherings. What makes it even more interesting is when you add a twist, like a reason why everyone is together...

7. While I hold it only modest esteem, I have for some time wonder, exactly what is the point of dressing snazy to walk into a lecture hall & pass your day as merely another face floating above a desk as in some strange sideshow manner? Only recently has it dawned on me that one does not make such efforts, almost sure to include some compulsive attention to detail, for the sake of one's peers. No, it is done merely out of the ultimate form of a concern for one's self & one's sense of self esteem, whether it need a boost or merely need to maintain it's already well elevated position.

8. I would benefit greatly from a dictionary copy written in the early 80s.

9. I've been listening more & more of late to songwriters, not lyricists. Its been a welcome refresher to say the absolute least.

10. The attention is quite flattering & the never ending desire to see me does an old soul like my own quite well. However the problem remains, that I'm neither in the mood nor of the inclination to provide that which you seek. Perhaps I assume too much, perhaps you really do just find my company that damn engaging but how much am I getting for this??

Cinnamon & Clove & Oranges

2010-10-17T12:24:00.004-06:00

1. Stepped out this weekend on two consecutive nights & discovered much to my surprise that I'm not as rusty as anticipated. I suppose somethings are never forgotten.

2. Opium addiction accounted for, Sherlock Holmes is one bad ass dude. Shaft was a towering brother whose presence alone would cause encourage your complete cooperation. Holmes is an average built man, whom you were under no inclination to acknowledge until he started rambling about most personal matters of your life after having met you for merely five minutes. Each dangerous in their own right but certainly not equals.

3. There's nothing like coming very close to losing your mother to put all of life's trivialities into perspective. It all became clear as a bell within 2hrs.

4. I'm asked ever so often what makes up the substance of my dreams. The honest answer : I dream of the days when all of my friends, near & distant have succeeded in accomplishing their goals and the most stressful conversation we have trying to get everyone in one place for a gathering old friends. I dream of those sappy Baby Boomer backyard BBQs, with kids running amok, pets lounging in the shade, and the retelling of the same tales from our 20s.

5. There is no point in taking your significant other out on a date if you have don't plan on the spending the time out with them exclusively. S/He should not be sitting at the bar, drinking alone, while you & your friends sit in the corner laughing like school girls. I'm not saying ignore your friends, rather keep your priorities straight. It doesn't matter how much of a sure shot you have on your hands.

6. Acknowledge the surface, don't become engrossed in it.

7. I must find a way to wear boots, chinos, & sweaters daily. This has to be the most comfortable uniform I've had in years.

8. When taking a man's life, it cost nothing to be polite - Sir Winston Churchill on formally declaring war

9. Sweet Potato Pie is on my mind!

Far from Gone

2010-10-06T22:00:00.005-06:00

1. Everytime I hear someone order a Grande non fat (insert flavor of choice) latte, it sounds like "I want my coffee to taste like squash & hot water".

7. "Just because I'm fcuking you does not mean that you rank higher than my established circle of friends." -Ophelia

3. I suspect I've been going about this the wrong way for quite sometime now and that explains the lack of desired results. Not that this moment of clarity has provided me with the perfect approach, I'll at least know what not to do.

4. Speak your piece on the matter, be at peace on the matter and move forward. They'll be no peace until you've cleared your conscience.

5. "He didn't grow up with brothers, so he doesn't understand the importance of relaying his decision to make a life altering change" - Haynes

6. The only thing I love more than watch the sunrise in the cold sans shirt is rolling back over in the bed and sleeping on that idea for another 3 hrs.

2. I double dog dare you.

8. When the fighters are all around, all the lovers are underground - Lupe

Here stands I, far from alone

2010-09-23T16:50:00.002-06:00

1. There exist, most certainly within the range of the appendages of my arm's appendage, all that my soul, mind, & body require to operate as a efficient & content collective.

2. Detachment doesn't always indicate a negative response. There are times you must employ a bit of distance to respond effectively.

3. Walking sticks should always have character. I don't look forward to the days when I'll need the assistance of one but I do know without an ounce of question that my walking stick will undoubtedly be the "coolest" walking stick two eyes could fall upon in that part of the century.

3a. I'm most interested in an excellent walking partner for that time as well. Quite frankly, much more than I desire the previously referenced apparatus. I suppose one must earn one of those much earlier in life though.

4. I have heard from trusted sources & tortured souls alike that in routine, there exist comfort. That we revert to routine in trying times as a coping system. For years I assumed such was logical, my distance from said experiences allowing me to casually accept this hypothesis. I believe it quite clearly now, as I attempt to establish a new(er) routine far too late.

5. Dog flatulence is the absolute worse thing to ever hit my ol' factory. Them boys almost went on strike #nolaborunion.

6. It's done recycled brick by brick. The very nature of it is green.

7. Let's hear a round of applause for Michael Vick!!!! Back on the field doing his job.

8. Nothing like hunger to make a man second guess a moment of passion & eat crow. It's an active beast, so can I get that stewed in some red wine. Biscuits not sliced bread, this is about humility.

9. Just say it why don't you?!

Strong base notes and a modest finish

2010-09-13T19:50:00.002-06:00

1. Abita's SOS was so-so, definitely expected a bit more from them. I know Pilsners go well with seafood but this didn't have enough kick. That's some resilient people along the coast, the charity brew should be equally as strong.

2. God bless the caregivers. Grant them never ending strength & rest that is always restorative for their lives are not their own and they aim only to comfort those in pain.

3. The fact that the news media was aware of the threat that would be posed to American Military personnel by publicizing the ramblings of a disturbed church leader intent on burning the Quran on the anniversary of the Sept 11 attacks & they insisted on looping the story for 5 days is a major problem. Their collective desire for improved ratings is going to create greater difficulty for the poor shleps working in combat zones.

4. Lesson #?? of adulthood: Physical exhaustion is the excuse children employ because they have yet to learn how to separate their bodies from their minds. Being able to operate completely rested is frowned upon in some circles.

5. There are times when a simple thank you, regardless of how genuine, feels insufficient.

6. I have the opening scene, some dramatic tension, & good dialogue all from one Nina Simone song.

7. Swallow your pride so you can address your hunger.

Blackened Berries

2010-09-03T16:17:00.001-06:00

1. There must be a cold front lurking somewhere near by because this heat is ridiculous.

2. For what it's worth, I miss you. That doesn't erase the last piece of unresolved business between you & I but I'm man enough to say it in this impersonal digital medium with no clear clue as to who you are. That's how our exchange began through an impersonal digital medium with seemingly no clue whatsoever.

3. I've bought Chewy organic dog food. I'm hoping I don't become one of those obsessive pet owners I've spent years finding amusement in observing.

4. It's family time in my group of friends. Engagements are well under way, children are due, birthdays & month milestones are being marked. & I'm standing on the side, with my dog, realizing that he's the most likely to ride through thick & thin.

5. This whole business of transcending desire troubles me. I'm actually quite fond of desire as it is attached in part to my creative impulse. I need desire to create, without it, I'm less than whole.

6. & yet again, the intangible is all that's requested.

7. What is there to comment on that hasn't already been noted? Wouldn't one do better to become familiar with what's already been spoken than to participate in repitious dialogue?

August Rain

2010-08-19T18:32:00.002-06:00

1. I saw an older couple walking down the street today. The husband walked a solid clip for his age while his wife lagged behind a bit, slowed by the need to use a walking cane. He turned around realizing she was behind him, albeit by about 15 ft, & waited. Once she caught up, he extended his hand & walked with her at her pace.

2. In the routine, we find peace. In the details, we find ourselves. In part(s).

3. 9 days from Nirvana, 4 days til class begins & 2 days until the weekend. Yes, it appears my life has been reduced to a series of countdowns.

4. I'll stop laughing when I cease to find it amusing. Not a minute prior.

5. I requested some gift giving advice from a trusted source. Much to my dismay, I was told what I had suspected all along, regarding the appropriateness of my intended gift, was indeed correct. Oh how infrequently one longs to be wrong. Alas, such a victory was not provided today. I have instead, chosen to settle for the "lesser" gift.

6. You & I share no common bonds, so forgive me if I fail to greet you with open arms.

7. The older I grow the less I fondness I have for Disney production studios. Which is ironic because I have at least 5 little people (cousins & Godchildren) in my life currently.

8. The question is never yes or no. The question is actually an if-then statement.

9. According to a recent NYTimes article, the 20's could be seen as a pre-adult developmental stage if academics & sociologists are successful in swaying the right opinion holders.

10. Logistics management is some interesting ish. Being responsible for knowing where everybody should at any given moment however, does not sound like fun.

11. I've been a Kanye fan for quite awhile, missed him opening for Talib in New Orleans back in '02 because I was between jobs. The new single kick heavy & the remixes are the ish! Leave the labels to the seamstresses.

Dog Days of Summer

2010-08-10T08:09:00.003-06:00

1. If you didn't want to play anymore, all you had to do was say I'm out instead of just not showing up at the usual spot anymore. You could've left a note even.

2. It's ridiculously hot these days. The air is thick, refusing to cool even if you move it with a fan. Where, I ask, is the beautiful month of October?

3. Way too excited about this new recycled fire hose chew toy coming for my pet monster (Chew Wu!)! We'll see if it's as durable as the website claims, he's already demolished in 60 days a calf shin bone that was supposed to last a year.

4. The best approach remains show & prove not discuss then deliver.

5. *late pass* Why does J. Timberlake sound like a fake ass Ginuwine? Why get the knock-off when you could just buy the original?

6. I want to start collecting art from aspiring artists. Not so that I can brag about having an early piece once they achieve a degree of notoriety in the art world, although I might should that happen. It's more about having a piece that may be riddled with technical errors that's still appealing. Life is full of such instances.

7. Don't just work with kids, bring something valuable with you to work other than your experiences. They have a good bit of their own as is & in some instances said experiences are probably harsh enough to empty your tear ducts.

8. Looks like the picture piece will have to wait & the quotes will be done first. Time to (re)learn the alphabet.

9. If you wanna, we could catch up on some lost time.

Tweeds & Houndsteeth

2010-08-05T21:13:00.002-06:00

1. If I make an apple pie, substituting cherries for apples, is it still an apple pie? No it's not, it's a cherry pie.

2. I'm only mildly intrigued this time, so I'm barely invested which means I expect smalls returns. Funny thing is, it's the little things...

3. Coral will be the color for Spring 2011. We've seen pink, orange, greens (lighter end), turquoise, yellow & most recently purple (lavender) in the past decade.

4. Gift giving is an art. Too generic, it comes across as an afterthought, go too specific & you come across as obsessive.

5. Just because there are sights to be seen doesn't mean you need to allow your gaze to linger.

6. There are times when you could use someone right there by your side. In the event you come to that point sans support, the only thing left to do is move forward.

7. I hate hearing the right thing from the wrong people. It's not that they're wrong, it's just the weight of the words is off.

Is it something I didn't say?!

2010-07-07T19:07:00.005-06:00

1. The inability to produce a summer beverage that retains it's flavor profile in the presence of ice is grounds for my mother to ban you from the kitchen. It doesn't matter if it's Kool Aid, Iced Tea (bag or powder mix) or iced coffee. Waste a gallon of water making something refreshing that tastes like tainted water in the presence of ice and you'll be banned from the kitchen until soup production season.

2. Summer brings out my sweet tooth like no other season. Lemon Meringue Pie, Peach Cobbler, Apple Pie just about any concoction that involves fruit, dough, and sugar is fair game. I may even try my hand at dessert production this year.

3. Chocolate City is looking less chocolate these days. Much to my dismay, I suspect this was going to happen when I returned 5 yrs ago.

4. This Oscar Grant verdict reads like salt in an open wound. The jury acquits, Gov. Schwarzenegger tells the Mayor of Oakland that the state of California, which is in record breaking debt, has the resources available to maintain peace & order. Translation: The Riot Squad ain't nothing but a phone call away. A woman's son was unequivocally murdered because a transit operator can't distinguish a taser from a gun. Why again does a damn train operator need a taser AND a gun?? Say what you want, but I've yet to see a news story about a non-African American Male being killed by a public servant. It's not the race card, it's the facts.

5. I don't have any children of my own (yet, Amen!) but my heart is trouble every time I hear of a child kidnapping case. I'm getting quite upset with little white children (girls mainly) making national headlines and the morning news shows. If you're going to report on missing children, tell the whole nation about the missing brown babies as well. Don't just tell us about it when the story is something sensational.

6. It's ridiculous that illegal immigrant is code for person of Hispanic Heritage. Truth be told, I'm sure their are more illegal aliens in the Tri-State Region than there are in the state of Arizona.

7. Freddie Joachim is heavy on my summer playlist & he should be on yours as well

Paper Bags, not plastics

2010-06-29T21:00:00.002-06:00

1. If an exchange is riddled with more stock replies than TD Waterhouse, chances are the deal has fallen through.

2. Whole Foods makes grocery acquisition exciting yet depressing. The layout is welcoming but, why wouldn't you want to spend $200/wk to feed one person?

3. Still don't understand how people were so-so about Michael Jackson before he died then became die hard fans post-mortem. If you were down with Mike, you were there for the good publicity as well as the questionable accusations. I'm not declaring his innocence or his guilt, just don't be a sunshine/bandwagon fan.

4. This Twilight phenomenon has gotten out of hand. I appreciate a good series as much as the next story lover but obsession is never the business. You don't go about neglecting reality & the people in your life for a TV series. That good people, is stupid.

5. As a kid I use to start off every summer by getting a new pair of sandals. Open toed shoes symbolic of the freedom that was mystically captured between June & August. I bought a new pair of flip flops last week, about a month after my summer began. Grant it, they haven't magically excused me from my adult responsibilities, it was nice to have a viable open toed footwear option again.

6. More is less, less is more but none is nada. Zero. Zip.

7. I don't have a favorite team in this years World Cup. I'm no Monday morning soccer fan either but why root for one when you can watch them determine who's the best?

8. Don't cold water another person's dreams even when you don't agree with them. Instead assure them you believe they will be successful & change the subject.

9. There are things that shouldn't be gleamed from your Facebook page by your good friends ("best friends" is an overused term void of any significance) and transmitted via phone tree.

10. Having Wednesday off is one of those pet peeves that you forget you have because the infrequency which it occurs. Until it happens again causing you to remember why it's so damn annoying.

11. Where is Beenie Man?? Girls Dem Suga ft Mya was off the chain!! I remember in high school if you could break down the patios, you were respected & looked at side ways. We didn't have any Jamaican students at my school. For all of it's cultural influences, New Orleans lacks tangible cultural diversity in it's public schools.

12. I'm all about fuel conversation, but there is no reason for a grown man wearing a suit to be riding a Vespa unless he's in Italy.

13. If you have no desire to actively be involved in the dirty work of parenting (doing homework, constructive discipline, emotional support etc) then employ condoms. There is nothing more annoying than cleaning up another person's mess.

Corn Dog Instructions

2010-06-18T13:05:00.002-06:00

1. For the love of strawberries!

2. I picked up my duffel from the baggage claim carousel & all I wanted to do was go home and sit with my woman. Just sit down on the sofa & watch tv before tv started watching me sit with my woman on the sofa.

3. My return flight was filled with visions of me accomplishing my goals with my dog being the only person at my side. No girlfriend, no wife, no lover. A sprinkling of friends, my immediate family, & my dog. It's as though I expect to go at it sans the boost that comes from an intimate partner. I'm most surprised at the absence of surprise at this dream, it as though as I've known this for sometime.

4. Networking means nothing if you're not expanding access to resources.

5. Ever notice how the sunset & the sunrise look alike as they sit on the horizon.

6. The silence isn't disturbing, it's the small sounds like a rock shifting that resonate louder because there are no competing sounds. The little sounds are make the silence annoying.

Does air belong in a can?

2010-06-02T22:26:00.001-06:00

1. I've nothing against burning bridges ,metaphorically of course. I've torched a few in my day with great joy. Truth is, it's not always the best approach. Now if I could only find a hiding place for my matches.

2. I think I prefer the act of writing over the act of typing. Ink bears no permanence but once I begin writing something out, it as though the thought must be completed. Now I'm beginning to wonder if my word choice & sentence structure differs between my hand written & typed pieces?

3. It's not that my reality just set in, i've been aware of it for a minute. For some reason, tonight it became remarkably clearer, crystal clear.

4. and I hope by chance I see you once again/I'd love to kiss your lips once again...

5. That breakfast easily belongs in the top 5 fast breakings I've participated in. Coffee not tea, ha!

He's here!

2010-05-23T09:15:00.003-06:00

Chew Wu!! No need for an alarm clock now

Dog Eared Pages

2010-05-16T12:33:00.001-06:00

1. Hard work always beats talent if talent don't work hard.

2. Disappointments & struggles are relative. Their impact can be minimized through comparative reasoning, at least its not (fill in the blank). The unknown is what is truly unnerving, as there is no point of reference.

3. There is such a thing as over analyzing a situation. I suspect I've come to this realization long after the milk has been spilled.

4. I'm not sure if I like the way HBO's Treme portrays New Orleans. While the factual representations of the city appear accurate, as best I recall, there's still something that's not quite right.

5. Brand loyalty is the rationale maintained my Blockbuster Online subscription instead of using NetFlix. Blockbuster filed bankruptcy. Seeing no need in lingering on a sinking ship, I am now a happy NetFlix customer, the Watch Instantly feature puts all sorts of otherwise unknown films at your fingertips.

6. My reading list can be completed if I finish at least 2 books/week.

7. I'm sure you've had a moment where you said/thought "if I'd known then what I know now". Of late, I seem to averaging 2/week. The humor in it all is that because you didn't know then you know now.

8. If you owe me one, then I owe you two.

9. Never doubt the capacity of your memory, it's the recall sequence that's usually a problem. I just recalled a trip to the hobby store 3 years ago while out of town on vacation. The store layout, the order we walked through it & even what prompted me to go on a hunt for fountain pens. I just can't recall what prompted us to go there in the first place & whether we picked it up. Oh yea, it was a picture to go over the sofa. Still not sure if we actually brought one home.

Really Big Shrimp

2010-04-19T11:31:00.001-06:00

1. I really wish I would have learned to enjoy the moment for what is a lot earlier on. I would've saved myself much confusion & disappointment.

2. To be critical or to be creative, that is the question.

3. In the event someone ventures to ask you what their take home message should be from a given exchange, respect their willingness to acknowledge the limits of their understanding & give them the blasted message. It doesn't matter how simple it is, just relay the message.

4. Is there such a thing as too much pop Chinese cuisine? The answer is yes, yes there is such a thing.

5. Every time I think to text you, I immediately remember that I don't care if I ever hear from you. I'd delete your number but I love the surprise of feeling that every time it happens!!

6. Touareg + Gun Powder= Yess!!!

7. Hand crafted items always rank higher in my book than mass produced goods. I suppose it's the old world charm that captures my attention, knowing that another person's day(s) was devoted to constructing this item.

8. Not quite sure of the next step & there definitely needs to be a consensus on what it will be exactly.

Purple People Eaters

2010-04-12T15:59:00.002-06:00

1. I could potentially make a small fortune at country festivals, just by infusing them with a little culinary variety. No Cordon Blue action, just something a bit more exciting than greasy corn dogs & roasted turkey legs.

2. There's a point where you realize that you're behind the curve a bit, out of the loop so to say. There are several possible approaches: attempt to catch up sans a sense of urgency, plan & execute some extreme information overload, or remain in the dark.

3. The journey (process) is more important than the destination (final result).

4. It's funny no matter how old you are, whenever a new exchange is developing there are always late night calls.

5. It's spring time, which means it's time for shorts. Know thy thighs & legs as they exists in the eyes of the rest of the world. Acquire the size that is most comfortable.

6. Boogie Man Music!!

It's 50 degrees out in March (why am I experiencing a NE'n spring in the south)

2010-03-29T21:11:00.002-06:00

1. He's a black republican in one of the most conservative states in the country (clearly below the Mason Dixon) & she's a California liberal who laughs at conservatives to make traffic less stressful. I'd put money on the expiration date of their dynamic, but that would be too easy. I'll report from the press box instead.

2. Lesson learned, kinda. In a fit of spring cleaning, I came across a old assignment that I never got clarity on. I need to get in touch with that professor but I've missed placed my old syllabus.

3. In the event I get these notions on paper & get some paper behind them, oh the impact they'll have.

4. Loose tea + cast iron tea pots = my latest interest. Loose leaf Chai in t-15 minutes

5. Sushi or middle eastern. Gelato or daquiris. short term returns or long term returns ± growth opportunity. Fresh or frozen. Curly or straight. Direct or mannered. Rhymed or un-rhymed. main focus or periphery. Colombian or Ethiopian. moment passed or moment yet experienced. untapped or unmerited. aisle seat or window seat. blueberry or cheese. butcher stripes or pin stripes. simple check or gingham. my loss or your gain. person vs position.

6. I'm close to settling on an acoustic guitar that I like & getting down to business on learning how to release beautiful music from it.

7. We ask questions to which we already know the answers because even when it fails to benefit us, there is always a small reward in being "right". In holding the correct answer behind door #3.

8. There are however, some questions whose answers are not to be released. Whose other halves remain the occupants of a dark room.

9. Let the record reflect that removal of a given object results in adaptation or extinction. Said adaptation occasionally involves transference while said extinction has a more complex morphology.

10. There is no challenge in making magic occur, it is merely a tightly sequenced series of events connected through subtle transitions. The challenge is in making sense, which involves a series of connected events with explicit transitions & very few subtleties .

Surrounded by....but I love home

2010-03-24T21:35:00.003-06:00

1. Tearing down the 'jects/creating plush holmes/ my circumstance is somewhere between Cabrini n Love Jones - Common

I passed what was once the projects recently & they've been replaced with new construction described as affordable housing. Their predecessors lacked significant aesthetic value, even from the minimalist perspective. A rather bland composition of bricks, concrete, wrought iron & and steel. These older structures survived a hurricane & all that landed on shore with it as the remainder of the city was annihilated. The new structures are wood framed & non insulated but aesthically acceptable. I never called the structures home so I have no concrete understanding of how efficient they were at being called such. I just don't understand, outside of the obvious economic advantage, what the impetus was that justified replacing brick & mortar structures with wooden ones in a land that is not completely protected from being flooded once more?

2. The further I travel on this journey, the more it is becoming obvious that I should switch vehicles sooner than later. I just don't want to deal with a note & banker's bullshit.

3. It's always a pleasure to hit shuffle on the ol iPod & discover a gem that would appear to be tucked away in some deep crevice on the rotating discs hidden behind that colorful screen. This occasionally results in the same song(s) being played exclusively for days.

4. I find it a tad more rewarding (hypothetically speaking) to go on a hunt where you can at least catch the scent early on. I'll consent that part of the whole experience is wandering through the woods, looking in all of the seemingly right places, hoping to find fresh tracks but tracks alone don't do you any good.

5. Oh the great discoveries that bewildered souls make! How much would remain a mystery, how much would we wonder at, unaware of it's complexity, had a few request been granted?? I suppose that such disappointments benefit the masses but how bittersweet they taste when it is understood that they were the results of burned oil.

6. I wonder how long I've convinced myself that it was probably for the better because the taste was too sour when I realized that it was ultimately my inaction that provide space for a distraction? How oft do we look off into the beauty of the horizon, reflecting on the beauty of the sunset in comparison to the one that precede it, all the while hoping that the one that will follow it will be equally as beautiful & ignoring the sun settling down before us.

7. Somedays the coffee doesn't work, the tea doesn't work, shit looking at the list of goals doesn't even work. Somedays the only thing that works is knowing that your word is out there & you owe it to the love, encouragement, & devotion invested to make the most out of it. Then there are somedays when even that doesn't do the trick, those are the days you go through the motions, all the while questioning your current place in the space.

Soundtrack: Dert - Prince Esthero (NO Knows Dope Nov 2k9)

Materials of Ages

2010-03-22T12:19:00.002-06:00

1. I'd really like to learn acoustic guitar & study Arabic. Summer's soundtrack may sound like unconnected noise but at least I'll now what it should resemble.

2. Finally caught Clooney in Up in the Air. The man is damn good. I'll leave the film geeks to elaborate on that more. The scenery was dull enough to make you focus on the story itself and it was done so smoothly. The film highlighted the personal element of the impersonal.

3. Non-Academic research interest don't always translate well into funded research. The lesson learned is substantive even if the grant isn't.

4. Once this health care bill hits the fan, as it will, there will be a strong bit of backlash. I don't want to prevent anyone from going to the doctor but the reality is being healthy cost money & the more the state covers, the more sway they hold in dictating public opinion & minimizing rebuke.

5. Distance = Comfort

6. Festival season is nearing & I'm ready to spend my weekends not sitting at a desk, doing work.

7. Don't lament the weather, instead lament your inability (refusal) to adapt to that which is necessary.

8. Folk art, its my latest interest. I want some.

9. It is quite interesting how much a puppy can shift the mood. He's managed to delay a study session, end an already brief managerial meeting & suspend a conference call.

10. You can find the Christ where the lepers & the lames at - Jay Electronica. I'll dare you to comment on that.

11. Boxes & bubbles work best for packing up goods not people.

Winter's Delights

2010-03-08T23:18:00.001-06:00

Oft I wondered under the weight of dawn
what held your gaze and feed your song
where did your arms, tanned as a fawn
did find themselves as the moon grew long.
Of these simple mysteries my mind did score
as a new days beginnings did spur my mind
while eyes sat refreshed, fixed on the shore.
In all these follies how quickly I forgot time,
these simple musings no longer need bear
their mass against my curl's dark home
for as the morn was filled with care
the noon anchored my mind to Rome
her plans tis said found no filling in a day
as I so gladly threw your shit away

Viewing Pleasure Bonus

2010-02-27T00:48:00.002-06:00

Props to Know the Ledge for the info

for your viewing pleasure

2010-02-25T16:03:00.003-06:00

1. Michael Sterling Eaton is director for Gil Scott Heron's Me & the Devil which in my humble opinion is an awesome audio-visual exeperience

2. Kanye's latest video for Coldest Winter works out quite beautifully as well

3. Swizz Beatz, an art officado?!

4. Stussy put together a nice 3 part documentary on J Dilla, give it a gander and learn a new thing

Shades of Gray

2010-02-15T22:23:00.002-06:00

1. Don't celebrate, announce, declare, swear, or in any other manner make it know publicly that you love someone on Valentine's Day. No matter how genuinely you may feel about the manner, you're asking for a raised eye brow reception esp if it's one sided.

2. Don't steal a man's wife regardless of how you feel about him, her, or the institution of marriage. The fact of the matter is this: He made a vow before whom he understands to be the divine power of the universe, if you interfere with him keeping his promise you're asking for defeat.

3. I don't wanna get caught pretending but I keep forgetting my lines!

4. I'm exhausted & we've only just begun.

5. You don't care & I can't make you. That's all well & good, but stop staring at that which you refused to be involved in. I'm sure you'll find a much more rewarding source of amusement elsewhere.

Getting down on the get down

2010-02-14T16:31:00.001-06:00

It's Valentine's Day!! I've put together a short list for you play as you celebrate "love" today. I'm sure you're resourceful enough to find, if you don't already have, most of these tracks.

Made for Love - Jose James
I Want You (Accapella & Congo Mix) Marvin Gaye
After the dance - Marvin Gaye
Makings of you - Curtis Mayfield
Teach you a lesson - Robin Thicke
Sweetest taboo - Sade
The Point of it all - Anthony Hamilton
Who Needs Forever (Thievery Corporation Remix) - Astrud Gilberto
Hypnotic - The Roots
Turn ya lights down low - Lauryn Hill
They don't know - Jon B

Nobody really wondered, man!!

2010-02-10T21:55:00.001-06:00

1. John Mayer, Really? I'm quite alright with Mr Mayer's lack of sexual attraction to black women. It's how he express his feelings that are the issue. I'll leave the gender studies theorists to provide a more sound academic explanation. TBH, I could give 2 sh!ts about who John Mayers screwing because our realities are soo far removed that it'll never directly affect me. This hyper sensitivity to all things racial is pissing me off, because had he claimed his member thought like Huey Newton there would be nothing but applause.
His apology leaves much to be desired, tis a shame songwriters aren't encouraged to be grammaticians for hoof & mouth moments like this!!

2. Remember Dilla! His musical genius has definitely influenced my musical taste.

3. The beauty of being outta the loop is that you're actual influence the next trend without being the least bit concerned.

4. Emergency dental surgery + 1st day of incarceration = I don't want my jaw broken for my TEETH the first week I'm in jail.

5. The best way to untie the knot occasionally means cutting it down the middle. The pieces make nice souvenirs.

6. Quote of the day taken out of context: You're worth more to me alive & well. I need you alive!

Serious Reward for Cupid's remains

2010-02-09T18:22:00.003-06:00

1. Gil Scott Heron's Me and the Devil is my current guilty pleasure. His voice brings so much of life's experiences with it that I can believe that he and the Devil went walking side by side. I'm no fan of the Devil but it's an interesting concept very artfully executed. (ihmo)

2. New Orleans Saints = Superbowl 44 Champions!!! If my enthuisams regarding this makes no sense to you, take a gander @ the New York Times' Sports section and catch up.

3. Love to touch your body, love to touch your body, love to touch your body...of love, of seduction, of the things lovers do (source)

3a. I genuinely despise the sappy notions associated with Feb 14 but there really is no escaping this shit. It's as though you'd have to live in some reality that was void of contact with the rest of the world, whether it be through print news, the web, or even radio. I'm still trying my darnedest to avoid it all, we'll see how successful I am in my endeavor.

4. This list are quaint but i'm having the dandiest time producing them. No writer, regardless of how little they've produced, wants to be redundant. It's like telling your friends the same stories over and over again.

5. What lies between pity and indifference? I really am curious...

6. I'm out of words because I'm overflowing with thoughts...

When your left arm is longer than your right arm

2010-01-29T11:30:00.002-06:00

1. It's the allure of the game that keeps calling my name. The injuries from last season tend to keep my ass on the bench.

2. Christmas 2010 (or sooner) I think I want Apple's latest creation, the iPad. I'll wait until Christmas to make sure the kinks are worked out.

3. Saints Super Bowl is definitely the way to kick off a new decade!!

4. This business of studying the English language, it's grammars & syntactical details, & the like have the potential to become my next obsession. I'm hoping to connect some theories to further my own understanding.

5. I picked up Corinne Bailey Rae's latest album, The Sea and am quite happy. I'm really just a sucker for her voice, she could probably read me the details of a UN resolution & would have nothing short of my full attention.

6. She spotted me like paparazzi & shot me a glance in that cat woman stance. It was the remnants of the coldest winter.

7. I've only been at this business for 3 days & I'm tired, like the coffee doesn't work any more tired. So now it's water that keeps me awake.

8. If you were playing like you were aware of what was at stake, you wouldn't be playing at all.

9. Humor me, once again. Lend me your ear as I tell you the tales of a ...

Optomologist's findings

2010-01-18T17:14:00.002-06:00

inside eye there lies
a source of continuous reflections
like a mirror over the water's edge, stretching off into the infinite nothingness of light waves as light waves interrupt my surface. through familiar places i wander
hoping to find something eye want to believe eye dropped. a token of affections past or perhaps the missing papers
to my long book covers. these places covered in light, bathed in yellows & greens
dressed up as fluorescent lights
hide no truths and explain no tales
like story tellers who've forgotten their arts.

Eyes filled with refreshments like once again disc played mints and hard candies
hoping to draw precious waters from their reservoirs scan through texts in search of
text that forms the beginnings of
sympathies, there is none. Readings from right to left direct these eyes to read left to right as reading left to right tells these eyes that they are allowed no holiday & rewarded with no prize.

Eyes as weathered as these are offered no respite from the sun, they are only expected to endure her power.
Eyes as weathered as these are offered no cold towels remind their lids of their youthful days.
Eyes as weathered as these are offered no cocoa butter to keep the lids from splitting and cracking & breaking from the abuses of the wind.
Eyes as weathered as these are offered no dark space to dream.
Eyes as weathered as these are offered the only thing cooler than wet towels on warm days, cold stares.

Why are there 5 Grammars & 5 humors??

2010-01-17T21:06:00.001-06:00

1. It should be noted that I strongly despise being vindictive. There is, in my humble opinion, no reason for reasonable adults to conduct themselves in a manner akin to the antics of grade school children whose good will has been quite readily ignored. The sad fact remains that I am indeed human & as a result, occasionally relish in listening to all that the silence carries to my ears.

2. There are blogs which exists for a purpose & blogs which exists for the author air their grievances with the world in the hopes that some like mind person will offer their sympathies & echo their frustrations. This blog, for the most part, is neither.

3. One of the most annoying things about being recognized by your peers as "brilliant" is that until you achieve something monumental, they will not find acceptable the minor accomplishments that encourage "ordinary" people to smile. The notion of impressing your friends is akin to the notion of impressing your mother, they've seen you're brilliance for soo long they actually expect you achieve the impossible on a regular basis.

4. We should not keep count of the relationships that are no more. We should relish in the memories they produced & allow those memories to manifest themselves on days when our countenance is less than it's best.

5. This cougar ish is getting annoying. I'm all about acknowledging beauty in all it's stages but finding myself talking to a women who have clear memories of the Nixon administration every time I go out is mildly unsettling.

6. I've always had trouble with putting any stock in local politics because it appears the corruption is taught at the dinner tables of seemingly every person involved in local government. Our mayoral primary is several weeks away & while I'm mildly optimistic about some of the major candidates running for office, for the most part, I'm holding all of my expectations on the side at the customs checkpoint at Hobby international. Just in case I need to send them to a place they'll be appreciated before they're deported.

7. Turquoise is supposedly the color for 2010, last year it was purple, & the year before it was yellow. Not too sure whose making these decisions but I'm @ all interested in seeing every grown a$$ man walking around in some variation of pink next year because it was declared the "in" color.

8. I wonder how on earth those cattle drivers made it across the Great Plains. Looking at a flat, never ending horizon would drive nuts.

9. If I find myself at another wedding questioning whether or not the people there are having a good time, I'm leaving. I hold no issue with the couple but if I am not truly enjoying myself, there's no point in me pretending.

10. Being mistaken for being older than you are right after high school is cool, being mistaken for being older than you are in your mid 20's means you're taking life too seriously or perhaps it means you've considered the future & it's not the biz.

8:05pm

2010-01-01T20:25:00.002-06:00

The moon's light held in her sights
all that made wrongs right
all that reduced journeys
to short drives & flights
all that moved my lungs to descend into my chest away from the light
all that my arms held when my finger decided to write
all that strengthened my knees & lifted my back when my strength would only allow both to crack
all that my eyes desired to behold as their swollen shut lids demanded a towel that was cold

All that i've known was before me in the moon's light just pass the tips of fingers

Merry Christmas!!

2009-12-25T12:37:00.002-06:00

1. Spend time with your loved ones

2. Spend some time w/ that person your not too loving towards. They're still in need of love.

thats all really, nothing else should matter right now. If it does, go get into & stop reading this post!

Who doesn't like line dancing?!

2009-12-06T13:56:00.003-06:00

1. Weddings can be interesting gatherings depending on how well you know the bride and groom & the members of their respective parties. It's also the last place you'd want to find yourself smiling out of politeness.

2. I admire those who work towards their goal(s) with no certainty regarding their attainment. Motivated not by the encouragement of naivete, but fueled by the euphoria of optimism.

3. It takes a significant understanding to genuinely feel empathy for people who are manipulative. Sadly enough, it's only in their passing do we even consider that path of understanding.

4. I honestly would change it all tomorrow if that were possible. Unfortunately, these matters require development, which takes time. It's akin to the work of a darkroom tech, you're not sure what will be on the negative. Even after the image is burned to the paper, it still needs time to dry.

5. Emily Dickson declared that minds in the same ground meet by tunneling. It'll be interesting to discover who I'll encounter in the depths of this soil.

6. Spoken words are like spilled milk, full of potential until greeted by indifference.

7. I'm taking bets on the duration of your tenure not because I have anything against you but every prince knows the charm only works if she lives in the palace.

8. After these next two, I might just toss my hand in and walk away from the table. I'll have to try again another night.

9. 2 ungloved thumbs up for this cold snap. Haven't had a December this cold since the storm (Katrina).

Norman Rocks Well

2009-11-26T15:03:00.001-06:00

It's Thanksgiving Day in the Good ol' US of A. There are a lot people who regard this holiday with a special brand of contempt as it is viewed as a celebration of the removal of the Americans from this land to make room for those who could no longer declare Europe as home for a variety of reasons, mostly because of the rampant religious persecution that was Rome's way of attempting to regain power & control of the churches they were so very much on the verge of losing.

I will readily acknowledge that the Westward expansion of the country, the introduction of foreign disease(s), the establishment of a colonial economy, & the tensions that are inherent in the collision of literate and oral cultures have all been glossed over in a romantic recollection of the pilgrims first years in America. Mainly of noble little Europeans in homely brown clothes & noble savages bka American Indians. The fact remains that the very systems/agencies that soo many of us find to be ridden with incompetence, inefficiency, & everything but compassion are here because of those early battles/conflicts. The historical perspective acknowledged, if the history of the nation soo deeply offends you, depart. Gather your material possessions & earnestly seek another to call home.

As you seek, keep in mind that the history of humanity is bloodshed, deception, exploitation, political unrest & strife, and oppression; wherever you search, you will find these elements in the country's history, for some much more recent than others. All the best in your search. I will however challenge you to acknowledge the limitations of humanity and leave your utopian notions to works of fiction, instead dealing with those you encounter on an individual basis.

Everyday should be a day of giving thanks, a continuous time of expressing gratitude to the divine for all which you have available to you, to the people who are in your life, for the blessings you've been given. Not what you're "lucky" to have as luck isn't real. Don't give thanks in comparison to those who have less than you (whatever that means), be grateful for what you have, unattached to anyone else's situation

Much thanks for all 5 of you who read this blog. It appreciate you allowing me to squat on the precious land of your conscience.

Yours in Truly
W

Swallows, Canaries, & Doves

2009-11-19T12:02:00.003-06:00

1. It's raining major life events all in my calendar. Weddings, births, & funerals are literally popping up every week, more so than usual. Not only am I alive & well, apparently so are my social networks.

2. In the same manner that one person can't be the scapegoat for all that goes wrong, nor can one person be the explanation of all that goes right. Grant it, the latter is more attractive than the former, it's crucial to maintain the proper perspective.

3. Knowing when to ask why but electing not to do so is wisdom. Hopefully I'll receive the answer to my inquiry without formally making one.

4. It's always easier to walk away. In some instances, it's actually the action to take with respects to self preservation. However, when life & limb are not compromised, it is often a favor to your character for you to remain. More so for the others involved than for yourself.

5. The older I get, the less I appreciation I have for cynicism, especially in the land of privilege that is the United States of America. Those attitudes are birthed often by a strong concern for the individual, often at the expense of others. Tis a mismanagement of food, air, & water to behave a in such a manner.

6. Since words are the essence of their definitions be aware that what you speak has power far beyond your realm of perception.

7. Tyler Perry is to be commended for addressing an audience he believed was neglected. He is know charged with furthering the understanding, perspective, & development of said audience. I hope that he accepts and acts on that reality sooner than latter.

8. For whatever reason, the tax dollars generated in my parish (county) have funded the development of my mayor's global perspective first hand. The man has been to Cuba, S. Africa, China (2x) & a host of other cities within the past four years. The least he could do is show the good people of New Orleans the photos and bring back souverniers for the city, some public art pieces, a theatrical tour, shit something.

9. Concerts sell out in this city constantly while small bookstores fight to remain open yet wonderment exists as to why our children fail standardized test @ an alarming rate...New Orleans, the spring of my discontent

10. There's a problem when school gets in the way of learning, much like the problem that exists when work interfere with life.

11. The tragedy in the murder of that little girl not only lies in the manner in which her final days unfolded, but also in the manner in which her mother's life played out for almost 30 yrs. Had her warning cries been heard, the headlines would read differently.

12. I'm not sure what prompted Europe to decide that they needed a president, we've been working on that model here in the States for 200 + yrs and there still appears to be some issues regarding efficiency.

13. I love fresh baked bread. Artisan breads to be specific, the ones that are made by hand, shaped irregularly, & have slight burn spots on the bottom. in case you were wondering

Brown stones with green souls

2009-11-04T17:38:00.002-06:00

1. It frustrates me to find myself at a loss for words to describe something I have recently experienced. Saying Thank You over & over again doesn't evoke the same sentiment as it does when it is repeated in a poem. Thank heavens for tone & inflection!!

2. In order to maximize your emotional out put in a relationship, make sure that what ever issues you have are being addressed outside of that by a licensed professional.

3. I'm not familiar with technical writing but if I had been I could have made some holiday $$. Guess who's doing some research on the matter very soon...

4. Country music, it's growing on me.

5. Appetite suppression is cool but I'm more interested in appetite control. The latter being a bit more difficult but also more rewarding.

6. Budget at least one trip every six months if your resources allow such away from the place you call home. Doesn't have a to be a transcontinental trip, just weekend away to a place that's about 1-2hr flight (those are usually cheaper, in the USA at least). Change in scenery is good for the soul.

7. Don't be afraid to be overly optimistic about someone, it may very well cause you to alter your approach to every thing else you're involved in, leading you towards desirable results.

8. I'm learning to appreciate that which time develops and diligence constructs.

Domestic Deliberations

2009-10-20T20:45:00.000-06:00

1. I know for a fact that expectations are the building blocks of disappointment but I still harbored them anyways, like illegal citizens I pitied, hoping to protect from ICE.

2. I suppose it's a long running tradition in academia to over intellectualize that which appears to be connected through a linear logic system. If it didn't then, there would be fewer grants to compete for or awarded for that matter.

3. Old folks say when your ears get hot, someone is talking about you. Still trying to figure out if what their says is good or bad, but since those are both relative I'll leave it unknown.

4. What is it about this American College System that can take the joy from studying anything? Perhaps, I'll have better results if I scrutinize my own approach.

5. Good guys don't finish last more likely than not, they throw their hands in the air in frustration only to have them land on a woman who isn't deserving of what they have to offer. This isn't usually acknowledge by friends & associates until they've been married for some time.

6. I'm planning to see Chris Rock's Good Hair Documentary. It's exciting to see a stand up comedian take an explorative approach to making me laugh. The nature of black women & their relationship with their hair is soo absurd & disappointing that only laughter will allow you to look at it with a clear head.

7. There's a point in life when birthdays cease to be exciting. Don't be shocked when you cross that threshold, just look at all the money you'll save by not celebrating.

8. I don't believe in politicians & their campaign miracles but Pres. Obama's first 6 months are forcing to wonder if I really picked the lesser of 2 evils. I suppose the word realistic needs to be incorporated into the guidelines for pre-election discussion.

9. Be mindful of the expiration date on the milk, but don't take it as fact. I had a glass that was 3 days past date & it was just as fresh as it was the day it came home.

10. It's ultimately you're fault anyways, so buy Brawny paper towels. Cleaning up is so much easier with quality paper towels.

11. Let's see if I can put out the fire while swimming in the soup pot...

Peace Up!

2009-10-12T14:32:00.002-06:00

The Foreign Exchange - ''I Wanna Know'' from The Foreign Exchange on Vimeo.

1. Watch the video. If you like it, support Foreign Exchange

2. I've been a late night poet for years but I've never ventured into spoken word. I think its the irregular meter that has prevented me from producing pieces of this nature. I'll be working on 2 spoken word pieces soon, once completed they'll be read at an open mic somewhere.

3. When did the nation with one of the largest defense budgets become the peace maker?? Clinton is working peace deals in Northern Ireland & between Turkey and Armenia. The latter has significance regarding oil pipelines but I'm not sure of the economic impact of the former. Any thoughts good readers??

4. I'm no fan of the reasons that brought Columbus to the Americas as they're not that much different than the reasons that send our troops across the world.

5. Still working on that new format Ophelia, give me a little more time.

6. I'm honestly beginning to enjoy my American Lit survey more than I expected I would. Not the class but the works of literature.

Gray Sweater Aesthetic

2009-09-29T22:46:00.003-06:00

yes, I know thats a blue sweater.

1. Why do you ask questions to which you already know the answers?

2. It's cooling off, a little at a time at last!! At this rate, Voodoo Fest should be damn cold.

3. Not being able to focus is only slightly more annoying than not being able to sleep unless the former's presence invites the latter. Then they are equally annoying.

4. Remember that most you'll be able to offer by the way of commentary regarding the bulk of life's concerns is a spectators commentary. Do your audience a favor & at the very least be well informed of the sport your watching.

5. Don't just wear the "in" pieces of the season, get the colors down as well. This means more than 2/ ensemble. If you're going to mimic runway trends, put some hmph into it.

6. Read Poor Richard's Almanac - Ben Franklin. The advice offered therein still applies.

7. On of these days, I'm going to actively watch what I say. Don't block out your calendars just yet though as the date is definitely unknown

8. Dickens was right, these are the best of times & the worst of times.

9. For whatever reason, every time they've returned. The ones who have been exiled. I'm not sure if they are gluttons for punishment, indifferent to indifference, blinded by the notion of loving conquering all, or just devout followers of the time changes all notion. What I do know is that, without fail they return, if only briefly. If only to play with flaming daggers in room whose floor is covered in hay. I suspect the most recent exile shall to return, despite the admonishment to remain away. I suppose one solid burn will be sufficient to relay the message in a manner that endorses compliance.

10. Don't doubt yourself as doing so will give others justification to do the same. In some cases, before your realize what's taken place.

11. Viva La Hova was a mash-up done well. If you don't like Coldplay & Jay-Z, don't waste your time.

12. It's always interesting to hear what people want to know by what they don't ask. It becomes annoying when it occurs too frequently

13. Don't be soo full of yourself that believe you have "haters". If your name doesn't ring bells in a circle of discipline specific nerds, you've yet to accomplish anything. I'm not talking about fashion followers , socialites, etc either. My name doesn't & I won't claim them when it does. Critics are there to find the holes in your work. If you're surrounded by people who can only formulate thoughts about other people, you need a new network.

14. Most things are better said in person, but a hand written note is a respectable medium when the former isn't an option.

Pour up my Foldgers

2009-09-11T18:44:00.003-06:00

1. When did bragging about a few relative accomplishments become the cool thing to do? I recall an era, albeit relatively short, where you got things done because that's what was needed. When there was bragging done, it was your family & friends speaking of their genuine pride in your accomplishments. It appears of late to be nothing more a group of primates beating their chests outside of mating season.

2. I don't believe in Hip-Hop/Rap/?? as a religious system like a more & more of my peers do but I follow if for nothing more than the fondness that one has for their 1st love. This mixtape manipulating, feature filetin, ad lib ambassador from Toronto by the name of Drake definitely produces an enjoyable project. It appears to be accurate, often being supported by the self reporting real time overseer known as social networking. Facebook, Twitter, & blogging have introduced an eerie level of accountability into life in the 22nd century.

3. FTR: Real Sneaker Heads miss meals for their love of kicks. If you're just blowing income that could be going towards a retirement fund, charitable donations, or your parents money, you are not a sneaker head.

4. I couldn't skip out on Obama's Health care Plan. First off, it's a complicated mess that needs immediate resolution, almost akin to walking into a fubard town & needing to rebuild it all in 3 weeks but you don't speak the local dialect. These complications being acknowledged, American Health care has been a for profit system for since the inclusion of minorities in the welfare system. I'm not blaming a(any) group of people for the current state of affairs, I'm aiming to develop an accurate historical perspective to further illustrate the severity of the problem.

This semester has legs on it so you'll have to pardon the sporadic updates. Wait, they've always been sporadic.

Wild Oats

2009-08-27T15:34:00.002-06:00

I cried a river over you
without ever shedding a tear
I ran in terror from you
without ever showing my fear
I listened to the worst of you
while standing as still as a dear
I washed my hands of you
without a bar of soap near
I thought day & night of you
actively forgetting you in a year
I envisioned the end of this
without the suffering of silence in my ear

Don't lock the laces!

2009-08-14T21:04:00.006-06:00

1. 2 opposable digits up for Saturday off!!

2. I'm not riding around on a conspiracy theory bus, but theres alot of questionable legislation coming from his O-ness's cabinet. First the Auto Industry Bailouts, now this healthcare plan. I'm all for equal access to healthcare for everybody but what about regulating private industry more aggressively and not endangering people lives the same way we endanger their magazine subscriptions.

3. Waking up instinctively before the sun rises is a side affect of adulthood I was not warned about and it is not in the least bit cool.

4. The energy involved in daily wrestling with your emotions and keep them in check is enought to fuel the exploration of a new hobby.

5. Why are Mrs. Fields cookies soo damn good? More importantly,why did I spend $10 on cookies the other day and not bat an eye??

6. It's never what you do, it's always the way its done. In the end, the action has been completed but the impact can vary greatly if you employ a poor method.

7. One time I bought this book just to rant on and on about details that were normally neglected. Since then, I've decided to leave such rantings to the obsessed least I be confused for one of them.

8. I owe you a story or 2. It should be a good one, filled with adventure and delight. I'll start on it tomorrow.

9. Don't fear the cougar, just back away very slowly, if you move too quickly it can be fatal.

Piano Solos are always the coolest...

2009-08-08T20:31:00.004-06:00

1. Drake provides the freshmen class a great service. It appears that he is a multi-talented artist. I suspect Universal hopes he's as complex as he's talented least the distrubuiton be a waste of their resources. I'm no hater, just a realist.

2. I wish you would've remained in cognegro than resurface to bullshit me along. It's all good though, one monkey does not stop the show

3. Is it me or does every other movie appear to be a commerical/recruitment video for some product/organization?? When the hell did a story line become insufficient?!

4. I never want to see another man in a dress for the rest of my life.

5. There is a great lesson to be learned in not over examining the everything. Its the quickest way to lose the forest for the trees.

6. The direct approach is always the best approach.

7. Where DO we belong?

8. I looked at my never ending list of things to do/short term goals. Should I accomplish them all, I suspect I won't remember the mechanics for a few months!

9. 3 weeks til the chaos begins & I couldn't be happier (jk).

nothing else for now, it's late & I'm too tired to censor myself which means I'll end this before I move myself into the dog house

8/9/09 edit

10. The difference between when to use a hatchet and when to use a scalpel comes down to how much of what your trimming you need leftover

11. Wal-Mart is a zoo, a very profitable zoo, but a zoo nonetheless

12. Given the factual nature of #11, you shouldn't go to Wal-Mart if your not in the frame of mind to deal with it. Going after work is not a good idea at all.

13. Theres something inherently soul-less about a barbershop that is open on Sunday.

Ohm Yes

2009-07-29T11:31:00.003-06:00

1. Prof. Gates' s ordeal & President Obama's remarks following it should be a lesson to America's citizenry, old & young alike.

It's all in your best interest to comply with the police in any interaction. I'm sure Prof. Gates has heard enough Driving while Black stories to know better. I'm not encouraging a blind to police brutality & the abuse of power that often comes with a badge but you don't threaten an officer with paper work that won't be filed until the next day as he stands in a position of power over you that night. As my mother would say " Pick your battles wisely, son."

2. How can I fault you when I've done the same thing?

3. I'm way too excited about this trip & I haven't even firmed up the details & bought the ticket yet. There's a child like joy I've immediately associated with this entire endeavor, although I've no qualms with declaring my membership in the card carrying world of grown man-dom, it's a sweet thing to look at life in such a pure manner.

4. I remember when my life was a much cheaper experience & there are days that I miss that. I usually come across some photos from that time & instantly become thankful that chapter is done.

5. All it takes is 20 mins of reading something more academically stimulating than Details magazine to realize I need to save my IQ from reaching body temperature.

6. There nights when I lay in bed awake, asking myself what I have done today to deserve a full night's rest. More times than not, I've come to the conclusion that I have no laurels to rest on but I do have 2 eyes that refuse to stay open any longer.

7. I have patience for children only, because they don't know any more than they've been exposed to, but these adults, F! 'em. Mercy but no patience for them - Rhone on dealing with life's challenges & people who make it plural. Easily the quote of the week.

8. I really want to go to this concert tonight not because I'm some huge fan of Stephen Marley rather because I was looking forward to the company. I suppose an opportunity will present itself again in the future as I spend the evening doing work.

9. I've come to conclusion that I will always be on the lookout for fresh kicks. My collection will probably grow exponentially as I age & my kids will be inclined to borrow them.

10. I'm more comfortable around extremist (far right or far left) than I am around moderates, even though I'm a moderate myself. There's something about the absence of ambiguity that I find most agreeable.

11. The phrase Southern Gentleman couldn't be more an insult when it's considered from a historically perspective. That being said, I find it most difficult to keep a straight face whenever I hear the term used.

12. I've been looking at the issue of homelessness here New Orleans this summer as a result of project I'm working on. It's beyond enraging how much this city (public & private sector) will contribute towards festivals, parties, & all other sorts of revelry. The attitude of hard work & self reliance is the back bone of the argument that "I got mine, they need to get theirs".

I see multi-million dollar condos being erected all across the city while disabled citizens live in 3rd world squalor awaiting death's deliverance.

13. Never underestimate the interest that charm can peak in the person your talking to, just make sure you're well enough versed lasso their attention.

...

2009-07-28T23:07:00.002-06:00

Summer's Groove

2009-07-18T07:49:00.005-06:00

Just a few tracks for all of your sun filled festivities

We Fight, We Love - Q Tip

Run to the Sun - N.E.R.D.

Unexpecetd Delight - Flying Lotus

Mr. Moon - Jamiroquai

Gobstopper - J Dilla

Venus 2 Mars - J*Davey

Skyscrapper - Ben Keney

Juice - Drake

Let's Call it Off - Peter Bjorn & John

Restless - Unkle

Come Tommorow - Van Hunt

Telephone - Erykah Badu

Hearbreak Hotel - Jackson 5

Montego Bay Spleen - St. Germain

In the Space - Janko Nilovic

Accident - TV on the Radio

10 Arguments Destined to fail

2009-07-13T19:44:00.003-06:00

(this bus can't be for the Kindergarderner's?)

In the interest of encouraging an engaging discussion on what the nature of the boundaries of a society are I've put together a brief list of arguments that beyond a shadow of a doubt, can not be won in my presence. Ladies & Gents, grab your legal pads and commence your deconstructions.

1. Any argument in defense of selling crack, heroin, meth, etc. Let's face it, there's no justification for having your hands in this sector of the black market. The jury is still out on guns, natural resources, & plasma TVs

2. On refusing to adhere to basic tenets of personal hygiene while working/existing in close contact with the majority of the population Clearly a pass is given to the homeless , whose life's circumstance prevent such personal upkeep from occurring. Hippies, Anarchists, jam banders etc have nooo excuse

3. The sale of children in impoverished countries to those rich enough to make charitable contributions, celebrity status optional

4. On being single handedly responsible for the lack of a particular item @ the buffet: Sharing is caring. Your presence @ the buffet alone signifies your agreement with this fundamental principle of humanity; don't counter it by eating ALL of the Teriyaki chicken skewers.

5. On not returning the first punch. The presence of law enforcement does not justify sacrificing your manhood. Let's face it, you've probably humiliated yourself significantly, so a last ditched effort at regaining your self respect wouldn't hurt in the least.

6. Visiting a foreign country with no understanding of the native language (i.e. Americans who travel abroad & demand inter/transactions to take place in English) Beyond the clear absence of any semblance of diplomatic concern, the lack of awareness displayed almost warrants a less than honest member of the local populace finding fortune in your possessions.

7. Wearing a sweater or other garment designed to retain body heat during June - September in any of the states who were members of the Confederacy south of S. Carolina. No explanation needed yet I see one idiot weekly with said garment"

8. Any entity that insists on denying the impact of Michael Jackson on international marketing. He's the only reason Pepsi still exists; think about it

9. PETA, there is no animal on this planet whose existence means more to me than that of another human being.

10. Let me know what argument(s) are just a no brainer in your book

now boarding...

2009-07-07T13:35:00.003-06:00

In all of my travels, it remains one of my most enjoyable experiences to look down out the window of the plane, like a kid on his first airplane ride, at dusk on communities of various sizes as the sun settles below the western horizon. The main arteries through the town are often wide winding lines of greenish white light with smaller orange streets attached to them like pieces of spaghetti left on the plate as the meatballs have been devoured in a greasy tomato sauced mess.

I’ve only started flying with some degree of regularity since two thousand six, the aftermath of Katrina providing an all too familiar back drop for many drastic changes. Its not that I was reluctant to traveling prior to the mass evacuation whose effects are still being studied by NTSB, it was this unfamiliar release, like my mind, body, and soul all exhaled at once as my eyes were forced to look upon an unfamiliar land and assess its potential to become the new home of my family’s future.

It wasn’t until I made the first trip back home, that I appreciated what was the mundane scenery of rural Arkansas. It wasn’t that the water rose higher than it should have and sat longer than it should have it was the film that remained that was so disconcerting. There was this grayish tan film that was allover everything that the waters touched. It was as though the rains had come to wash the city’s dirt away and the dead skins cells of the life that was left allover everything. It reminded me of nights in my youth that involved me taking a bath (my rise to the privileged shower was a steady one) and on the nights when water sports carried my attention farther than the measly notions of my land based toys, I would find my skin covered in the dead skin cells I had so diligently sloshed off, forcing me to repeat my cleansing. This was all I could see everywhere I looked, in the lingering summer heat that was abundant in the end of September 2005. The open road promised landscapes that were soap scum free & I was desperate need of clean buildings and foliage.

I needed to know that elsewhere when the rains fell the dirt was removed making the mortar and glass shine anew. The grass had to benefit from water elsewhere, even when shifting weather patterns were the explanations that meteorologist gave for the droughts that burned the grass from lawns as smoothly as those Laser Hair removal commercials advertise. I needed to see rush hour traffic in a city unaffected by a natural disaster. Running late for work in New Orleans can be an uber depressing experience, the time you spend navigating clogged logistical arties entertaining the most dire questions, should I even be living here, let alone putting up with this bs @ work??

At first I couldn’t exactly place my finger on it, the air was fresher (it wasn’t, smog is a problem everywhere), the people were more serious (American’s can be some rude mofos, big surprise) & all other sorts of evasive rationalizations that I turned towards, feeling guilty for needing to escape the chronicles of death that a city in the building process showcases. The varying stages of return illustrated down several blocks of a side street between two boulevards, the ones that encourage drivers to cut thru the neighborhood making a game of football in the street a little more dangerous than touch/tag on concrete normally has enraptured in it. I need to see life’s difficulties unfold in a much more appealing landscape…

Calluses and such

2009-07-06T20:02:00.005-06:00

1. I enjoy Michael Jackson's music as much as the next person but the marathons & streaming updates about the execution of his last will & testament are too much. I'm sure there's some questionable foreign policy decisions being made right now but they won't hit the news until after his funeral.

2. I've no issue or latent grudge with you. There's merely nothing resembling a conversation forming when I scroll over your number in my phone.

3. Swagger(a) & all its etymological relatives have no place in the daily vocabulary of anyone whose daily agenda involves them presenting a professional image in any of it's varying degrees.

4. I'm considering moving to Italy & becoming a cobbler. I'll keep you posted on how that develops.

5. In light of the future arrival of God child #2 & the pseudo science of gender prediction based on the behavior of the father, which is giving us a 80% chance of a baby girl. I feel encouraged to make vocal my disdain for adults who allow & God forbid encourage their daughters, nieces, cousins, God children, etc. to carry themselves in a less than lady like manner. No way should a 14 yr girl be dressed comparable to a 24 yr old woamn unless they're both in a wedding. It's disgusting to consider the torture that children are forced to endure at the hands of adults who supposidely love them but find guiding them to adult to be a task better handled by the wolves.

6. There's something very soothing about listening to group recitations of Quaranic & Torahnic verse. I'm not sure what it is but, it has the potential to become one of my main search pharses on YouTube.

7. Twitter makes sense to me but it just doesn't appeal. I'm not that starved for attention & connection.

8. Limited Edition sneakers lose 75% of their appeal the instant they become accessible to the mass public.

9. Urban Takeout is a really cool blog. Take a look!!

10. The age old question of : What is a man ? Is often answered initially by what a man isn't. That understanding while honest, doesn't provide a framework that's universal enough to answer the question on a broad scale. I'm looking for something mildy definitive & potentially concrete.

11. Summer's sights are occasionally worthy of the weather which necessitates their arrival.

12. Yo te veo!

Changes Underway

2009-06-27T21:30:00.003-06:00

It's time for a fresh look, so I'll be cycling through templates over in the near the future. Fell free to add your 2cents on the layout(s).

Thanks

Peep This!

2009-06-16T22:26:00.003-06:00

The movie is slated to release Winter 2009! I can't wait!

It's an interesting look at American Foreign Policy & Combat ideaologies

titleless

2009-06-03T09:51:00.005-06:00

Editor's Note:This needs a title besides the obvious shoe game(s), any suggestions??

My move forward maybe void of you
only one fits the void of you
like a foot only fits inside of a shoe
I've walked holes in this pair
scuffing the toes
bruising the side panels
like they weren't the walls of my sole.
I tried to hang on by my laces but they were locked
dangling from the side was akin to wearing them with no socks
Yep, my move forward maybe void of you,
this journey calls for sandals
not shiny dress shoes

Apple Bran Muffins

2009-05-15T19:04:00.004-06:00

1. Having the day off from work is the quickest way to spend too much money while doing too little of significance.

2. The better you sound explaining what you do for a living the more you sound a like a lifeless nerd.

3. There is nothing more effective at making me (an occasionally logicalvcreature) reconsider my inability to venture into this dating business than looking @ the portion of my library that remains unread.

4. My desire to know a good bit about of things has the potential to make me a well respected member of academia & eternally single. The former is cool, the latter utterly frightening.

5. Respect the middle (wo)men in your life. It's too easy to overlook those who actively make your life easier.

6. In search of the Divine, I find myself seeking out the truths of Islam & Judaism. I'm not walking away from that which I believe, merely attempting to reconcile the differences.

7. I don't like the term quarter life crisis. I just need to sort somethings out.

8. Its been said that you'll find that which you seek as soon as you cease seeking. That's a lie.

9. As much as my ego enjoys being in demand & requested, I'll be doing my darndest to not be present at these socializing/networking events. I'm a college student going through all the uncomfortablness that's associated therein. I am not a young professional looking for a desirable venue (yet!). Nor do I have any interest in being humiliated as I contiously am requested to explain what it is I do where I work & why I don't have any business cards.

10. Beautiful World - Robin Thicke has this dreamy scene of a pleasant early night cuddling session. It's the perfect background song for an innocent love scene. Not one of those fcuk sessions where siht gets destroyed & a sport medicine clinician is need to make sense of what's left.

11. Don't you just love how pandemics(Swine Flu) appear over night only to vanish into thin air. I was looking forward to the carnage but I guess it didn't scare the masses like it was supposed.

12. Lost one, found one and even out in the end. It's funny how the seasons change...

13. In the interest of your self interest, lose the dead weight.

Rolling Hills

2009-05-04T12:43:00.005-06:00

Pride won't allocate my face tears

as my eyes see all of their lobbying in vain
my emotions have run rest away
from its rightful land

claiming the rights of squatters
my ideals have lied to me in the most innocent way
as my realities have taken my kindness for naiveté
doing only what served their interest
I was foolish to think they were to programed to do anything else
if my brain hadn't been conned by my ego
then he would have seen that

a field is nothing more than a field
it's not a parcel of land for him to build a house
not a piece of the American dream waiting to be harvested
it is nothing more than expanse of wild flowers & grass

that expands farther into the horizon than any his wildest dreams or most sincere desires

It's purpose is to have its beauty admired from afar
appreciating that all it is will cease to be as soon as he holds the title

Eye Le(v)el

2009-04-22T12:02:00.002-06:00

I woke up this morning and as I manuevered my way into the bathroom, I looked in the mirror & my reflection disappointed me.

This usually happened in my teen years when I had some crazy dream that I'd awake looking like Morris Chestnutt or whomever was the latest & greatest black man that moved women into a frenzied trance of emotion. The let down was always made manifest as a red zit somwhere on my face. Nothing like a little harmonial imbalance to re-introduce reality into the situation.

This morning there was no zit or blackhead to take what little wind that was available out of my lungs as my palms were shocked into action by the cold porcelain face bowl where my all of my morning ritual(s) take place. The morning had long since made itself known, I was bit tardy in my salutations. For the first time I looked into my own eyes, covered in infamous morning crust, you the crust that one kid still had on his face at lunch time. If we'd known how rough his mornings really were, we probably would've been a bit more understanding. As I removed that crust away from eyes I took a deep look at the face those eyes rested in and I stepped back slowly in disbelief. I saw my parents in my face, clearly like their faces had been blended into my own. The face that I own was clearly inherited, without death.

I've always been proud of my parents and while I haven't always understood them, they've always had my support. In return, I merely wanted to look like a blending of them but not a clear carbon copy of them both. This morning my dad's chin clef and my mom's crows feet were allover my face. It was though they were working my face together and which ever part he didn't supply she immediately produced, leaving nothing to natural selection.

I couldn't be happier with the end result.

lightning fields...power chords...scatter brained

2009-04-12T21:54:00.006-06:00

It's still there. I'm still here. I'll update the blog better once the semester comes to a close.

until next time:

1. By the time her friends decided to interfere, I'd already completed my objective.

2. Get over yourself ack. I'm sure you're worth the hype but thats only in your mind. On second thought keep at it, if nothing else you make small talk slightly larger.

3. I soo need that gathering tonight. Dinner with a small group of friends should be the national past time. (after major league sports of course)

4. Why does it feel like school interefers with the studying I want to do?

5. Just because I'm majoring in english literature does not mean I've read (heard of even) every major author from every minor literary moovement in the last century.

2009-04-04T08:58:00.001-06:00

The Best Method!!

April's Fools

2009-03-30T23:50:00.004-06:00

It would be naïve of me to assume that we would never have those annoying obligatory exchanges. The ones where the “right” questions are posed in succession with the calculated but slightly random 7-10 second pause as the list is covered. I’d rather sporadic honesty much more than regular calculated concern.
Forgetting events/people/places isn’t actually that bad….I usually forget where my cell phone & keys were last. Those are of immediate importance
I made a concerted effort to not speak in class today in an effort to make sure that the opinions that aren’t voiced when I speak were heard. I made it all the way to the last 10 minutes & blah. I spoke.
There is no reason why I’m nervous every time I do this but I am. The more advanced notice, the more I fret over it. I’ve begun to upset my friends with what has been deemed unnecessary nagging concern. So in an effort to at the very least glimpse at a better start, I’m reducing my concern to 0…..0.3632
There are moments, innocent stretches of time as I switch from one task to another, when I want to burn it all down and build a forest. Not literally burn something down, but just scrap the past and look back on a clean slate. Such luxuries are only afforded to those who have nothing left and I find that particular experience neither luxurious nor desirable. My canvas with its wear spots, stains, and uneven weaving will work just fine, for the moment at least0.
One of the joys of hiking is that as you progress (in some not all cases) the trail gradually climbs upwards. There are segments of the trail when the incline is quite steep, but for the most part it’s a gradual ascent.
It’s becoming less and less clear to me exactly why I bother with this social ritual that is so popular amongst my peers. I’ve no real victories; in fact, most of my experiences have resulted in me walking away realizing that it has traveled as far as it will go. Anything further would be a mismanagement of time and a clear illustration of what is meant by the phrase “Lacking self respect” as no self respecting individual would continue to humiliate themselves for the sake of some silly notion. It isn’t attractive; toss that sentimental romantic shit out of the window, it’s just stupid. The subsequent days that those who are spent reviewing where I went wrong. Yet all the review in the world does nothing to change what has occurred and it doesn’t always apply to the next experience. Hence my resignation to make the logical choice and abandon dating all together. I’m sure there a multitude of successful ventures I’ve yet to explore behind my stubborn desire to make that which isn’t working, work.
I wish we never met. You’re a wonderful person, full of life and creativity and all of the other things that make people desirable. Interesting thing is, I haven’t seen much of that lately and I don’t know why. I never really understood how all of this began and as a result I’ve never been comfortable with where it was going because well I had no idea. How does one organize his emotions when he’s no clue as to what’s taking place or why? Actually I knew all along, it was just a matter of acknowledging the obvious.
Selling children is supposedly a crime against humanity but how many children are purchased from developing countries by well off Americans hoping to manifest some semblance of social justice? What about the children in the domestic adoption system? I guess American brown babies are cute anymore…
The more I think about graduate school, the more I want to abandon the idea completely and become an outdoorsman. Living in the wild, devoid of technology and 95% of the stresses that are associated with being one electronic medium away from being contacted. No worries (not that you were concerned in the first place) I’ve grown a bit fond of showering with hot water on a regular basis.
I’m switching back to sugar in my coffee, this honey business is quaint but it leaves something to be desired. I shouldn’t have that feeling over breakfast; it’s just a horrible way to start the day.
Even when I wrong I still got my point across...
Survey shows that someone is putting their psychology degree to use.